


Tangled

by clovermonkey



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Bottom Lance (Voltron), Drug Use, Drugs, Dry Humping, Dry Orgasm, Eventual Smut, Female Pidge | Katie Holt, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Fluff and Smut, Gay Keith (Voltron), Hurt Lance (Voltron), Korean Keith (Voltron), M/M, Mutual Pining, POV Keith (Voltron), Romantic Soulmates, Shameless Smut, Smut, So much angst, Soulmates, but it's very brief, slav mention, unwanted kissing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-15
Updated: 2018-07-20
Packaged: 2019-03-19 01:01:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13693608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clovermonkey/pseuds/clovermonkey
Summary: When I reach for the handle, I feel my chest spasm in panic as I realize something. The connection between me and my soulmate isn't open. I shouldn't be able to see Lance right now without the connection, but I do. Lance is really here with only a few feet and a door between us.Keith hates the concept of soulmates, but he happened to be one of the few people in the world connected to someone. He never expected them to actually meet, much less meet so suddenly(I'm reposting this from fanfiction.net so I'm not plagiarizing)





	1. Soulmates Are Stupid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith hates soulmates but he never expected to meet his, much less like this.

He's applying another stupid face mask again, I notice as I brush my teeth.

He's waiting a table at a diner with that stupid apron tied around his hips, I watch while paying for my lunch in a fast food restaurant.

He's flirting with someone else, but I try to ignore it while doing my homework.

Soulmates are stupid.

When we connected a few years ago, it was torture on my end. I would see him everywhere and it was terribly distracting. He seemed ecstatic, though - I learned to read lips through him and I catch him saying "soulmate" all the time to others.

He can't see me, though, and for that I'm relieved. I would've hated to break down his spirit if he saw my annoyance when we connected.

The universe is stupid.

It decides to connect two strangers together spontaneously and give them consequences for it. Not even everybody gets connected with someone, so why did I - someone who hates the entire concept - have to be one of the few who did?

Soulmates are able to feel the emotions, pain, and pleasure the other feels as long as their connection is open or if it's strong enough. Along with that, if their connection is open, they also can taste, smell, see, or hear the other, but it's different for everybody.

For me, I see my soulmate through reflective surfaces. I suspect mine can taste what I taste - I once ate a jalapeno with our connection open and I couldn't help but laugh as he started bouncing around and fanning his tongue. But that's one of the few sentimental moments we've shared in the years we've been connected, and I often feel guilty about it. After all, it is my fault for being distant with him.

His name is Lance, but I feel uncomfortable knowing that private information. The only reason I found out was by basically spying on him while he was working and read his nametag while our connection was open.

It's torture, really. Sometimes when our connection is open, I find myself blatantly watching him just because I can't resist. While I hate having a soulmate, I can't ignore the connection we have, as cliché as that may sound.

I'm always chastised by my friend to be thankful but I can't stand when something this big is out of my hands. And that's where I am now - stuck through a lecture led by my friend, Shiro, on why I should be grateful to be paired by the universe.

At moments like this, I regret choosing him as the only person to know about my soulmate.

"-that so many people wish they could have a soulmate? And by the way you're describing him, it sounds like your soulmate is ecstatic to have you," he crosses his arms and leans his hip against the side of the bench where I sit.

I roll my eyes and tighten my leather jacket around me - it's colder today than I expected it to be - before saying, "Okay, Dad, now are you done with your daily lecture?"

"Yes," he replies matter-of-factly.

I huff but hide my smirk as I point out, "You're just jealous because you're secretly a hopeless romantic at heart."

He punches my shoulder but I don't have to look at him to know he's sporting a small blush on his ears and neck.

Before he can protest, the bus finally comes and we hurry onto it and out of the cold, even though it is only a few degrees warmer inside. We take our seats side by side in silence.

"Have you found a new job yet?" Shiro suddenly asks after a while.

I sigh. He has asked me everyday since I got fired from my last one. "No."

"Good," he grins, causing me to look at him incredulously. "I think I can get you one where I work. Matt just quit so there's a new opening for a cashier."

"Really?" I sit up, hopeful.

Shiro nods, "I'll talk to my boss about getting you an interview and text you later to let you know what he says."

I smile, "Thanks. That would help a lot."

"I know," he smiles back. The bus slows to a stop and he stands up, resting his hand on my shoulder briefly. "I'll talk to you later, yeah?"

I nod and he gets off. Fortunately for him, this bus stop is on the same block as the convenience store where he works. Unfortunately for me, after two more stops I get off and still have to walk three blocks to get to my apartment building.

Once I pay and get off the bus, I immediately put in my earbuds and turn on some music. The wind picks up and the sun has set almost completely so I cross my arms and duck my head down in an attempt to keep myself warm. It has gotten ridiculously cold and it's only November. I don't even own a winter coat.

With a nearly frostbitten nose, I finally make it inside the building and shake out my limbs, as if it will expel the cold faster. I press the button for the elevator and toy with my keys as I wait. That is, until I feel the connection opening.

It's like a wind hitting me full force while my stomach simultaneously becomes nauseous. I shudder and hurry into the elevator where it's a little more private than the lobby. After pressing the fourth floor button, I press my back against the wall facing the closing doors and grip onto the railing, a sudden, strong feeling pounding into my chest. I grip my eyes shut but can't help feel worried - usually my soulmate's emotions are positive, but this one feels like a dull anxiety.

Curiosity compels me to open my eyes. A green "2" blinks above the elevator doors. My eyes flicker to the reflective metal wall to my right and I see him pacing in his room with his friend - who I often see with him - sitting on his bed watching him apprehensively. Once the elevator lugs to a stop, I rush out and into my apartment after nearly dropping my keys several times trying to unlock the door. When inside, I avoid looking at any reflective surfaces while kicking my shoes off and tossing my leather jacket and backpack on the couch.

I find myself glancing at the TV, watching Lance in its dark reflection. His friend is no longer in his room and he is sitting on the edge of his bed, elbows on his knees and hands crossed. I step closer to get a better look and notice he's talking to himself.

"-really wish you. . . with me. Are. . . even there?" I make out. I sigh and slump over, letting his now lonely and longing emotions fill my chest, too. He's talking to me.

I hurry to my fridge, acting on pure impulse, and search through its contents. I can't help but smirk when I see the almost empty jar of jalapenos. I grab it and my half-gallon jug of milk and hurry into my bathroom as our connection starts to weaken. My mirror shows me Lance is now laying on his back, hands covering his face with his legs still dangling off the end of the bed. The lonely feeling he is conveying is getting stronger.

After practically tearing off the lid to the jar, I take out two slices of jalapenos and drop them in my mouth, masticating them thoroughly so the spice covers all sides of my tongue. It doesn't take long until I see Lance snap up, hands covering his mouth. He searches around his room frantically for anything to drink so I take my milk and chug some of it. Relief instantly washes over his face and I notice his shoulders shake with a small chuckle. A warm feeling radiates through my chest and I smile.

Relief and happiness.

"I'm here," I whisper without thinking. The connection ends shortly after and the reflection of Lance in his room fades into my pale face, clouded by dark hair. Immediately, the smile from my face and happiness in my chest are replaced by a frown and a sour feeling in the pit of my stomach.

Soulmates are stupid.

* * *

 

"I mean, I really appreciate the help getting me a job and all, but did you have to schedule my interview for me?" I huff, shrugging my shoulder to hike my backpack farther up my shoulder, walking quickly down the sidewalk.

"For the last time, I didn't schedule it for you. This morning is the only available time my boss has for the next two weeks. Don't you need to pay for rent?" he points out, enticing a scowl from me. "He's leaving tonight with his family for vacation. You're lucky he even agreed to interview you today."

I roll my eyes, "I guess I should also thank you for waking me up at two in the morning to tell me the interview was six hours from then, yeah? I hardly got any sleep after that! I had to find an outfit, rewrite my resume, and run to the library and back to print it. And it was freezing out! Not to mention we missed the bus because of it, hence why we're practically jogging there now."

Shiro groans, "I'm sorry, okay? I fell asleep and forgot to tell you. Then, Slav woke me up at 2 and I couldn't go back to sleep - that's when I remembered to call you."

"I hate your stupid cat," I grumble.

"Yeah, he tends to be very. . . inconvenient," he winces, rubbing the back of his neck. "Anyway, come on. We have ten minutes to get there," he says, grabbing the handle of my backpack and pushing me forward.

"Easy, easy, we're right down the block from it," I frown, swatting his hand away.  
When we walk inside a short while later, I shudder in the warmth. It's colder today, but I was more prepared than yesterday. Above my dress shirt, I have a hoodie and my leather jacket on top along with my gloves. Shiro orders me to take off my layers while he fetches his boss from the back of the store, and I do without too much protest since it's much warmer in the store. I also take my resume out from my backpack and kick the pile of my jackets and backpack out of the way and behind the counter where Shiro also dropped his own coat.

Soon after, he returns with a tall man. But, when Shiro sees my wrinkled, black dress shirt with the top button undone, the pep in his step vanishes. I mentally blame the fact that I couldn't iron it this morning on him.

"You must be Keith," his boss states, holding out his hand for me to shake. He doesn't seem too concerned about my wrinkled shirt, at least. "I'm Kolivan."  
I shake his hand, "Nice to meet you."

"Shiro tells me you need a job. Could you answer a few questions for me?" he asks. I nod and Kolivan begins to ask me brief questions. My availability, work experience, how much I want my starting pay to be, and if I have a criminal record. The whole thing takes less than five minutes. Kolivan clasps his hands together loudly. "Great, you've got the job. I'll pencil you in the schedule and we can get you started by next Monday. Does that sound good?"

I blink at him, surprised. "Uh, really? Yeah, that sounds great."

"Good. Now if you two will excuse me, I have quite a bit work to get done before my flight," he grins before walking away.

"Uh. . ." I mumble, my forlorn resume crinkling slightly in my hand. Even Shiro looks surprised. "That was. . . fast."

Shiro laughs breathily. "I have no idea what that was. Just be glad - he's usually much harder on people he interviews."

"Must be because he's in a rush," I shrug, crumpling my resume into a ball.

Shiro smirks, "Or he just likes me."

I squint at him, "That doesn't make any sense."

"Sure it does. Now, let's go. You need to get to class soon," he says, nodding at my things on the floor.

"I still have half an hour," I protest, but begin putting my jackets back on anyway.

"Then we'll stop for coffee to celebrate your new job on the way," he smirks. I tug my gloves on and throw my backpack over my shoulder again, sighing. "I'll pay, don't worry. Plus, there's a diner on the way that I've been wanting to try out."

We head out and ride the bus into campus. We're dropped off on the same block as the diner Shiro mentioned so we head there. "I don't have to go in, do I?" I ask once I spot a familiar silhouette ahead walking towards us.

"No, we can get it to go. Why don't you want to go in?" he asks.

"I see a friend up there I want to catch up with, do you mind?" I ask.

He shakes his head, "No, I'll be back out soon."

I nod and we split up, him entering the diner and me walking past it. "Pidge!" I call out, winning her attention over the phone in her gloved hands. I wave to her and she waves back, jogging up to me.

"Hey, Kazoo, what's up?" she grins.

I roll my eyes but smirk at her new, odd greeting. "I'm going to head to class after my friend grabs me a coffee," I say, nodding my head towards the diner. She glances at it briefly as I add, "What about you?"

"I'm heading to class, too. Who's your friend?" she asks, shoving her phone and hands into the pockets of her giant, puffy coat. "Shiro. He sometimes works as an assistant to one of the professors."

"His name sounds familiar," she tilts her head in thought, "Which professor?"

"Mr. Wimbleton. He teaches technology, I think," I respond.

"Why only sometimes?" she asks, kicking a pebble past my feet.

"Well, Shiro actually has a prosthetic arm so whenever Mr. Wimbleton needs him for a class, he's there," I shrug. "Plus he has a second job."

Pidge's eyes brighten. "No way! That's so cool, can I see it?"

I smirk, "You'll have to wait for him to come back out but I'm sure he won't mind, Pidgeon."

She scowls as I attempt to ruffle her hair through the hat on her head. Shiro comes back outside as she fixes it. "Ready?" he asks, handing me a steaming to-go cup.

"Not yet. Shiro, this is Pidge. She's a student here for technological astrology-" I start.

"Astrophysics. Technological astrophysics," she corrects. "Keith tells me you have a prosthetic. Could I see?" she adds excitedly. Shiro grins, "Sure." He rolls up his sleeve just below his right elbow and stretches out his metal fingers.

"Wow," Pidge muses. "That's so cool!"

"Pidge believes that someday she will have prosthetic legs with jets built into the heels," I smirk at Shiro.

She kicks my shin, "Only when I was younger I did!"

"Hey, you wouldn't happen to be related to Matt Holt, would you?" he asks before taking a sip of his own coffee.

"Yeah, he's my brother, do you know him?" she asks.

Shiro nods, "I used to work with him but he just quit."

"That's why your name sounded familiar," Pidge realizes.

As we talk, we make our way to our classes together, Pidge somehow managing to drink half of my coffee before we go our separate ways. Once inside the building of my first class, I chug the remaining coffee before tossing the cup in a bin outside my classroom. So much for my reward for getting a job.

By the time I finish my classes, it's past lunchtime and my stomach had been growling throughout the entirety of the last one. I take a mental note to eat more than a bagel for breakfast from now on as I head for the bus stop. It's Thursday today, meaning Shiro works all afternoon and therefore I have no plans. I spot the diner from this morning between me and the bus stop and my stomach growls again. After contemplating the small and quickly diminishing money in my wallet, I decide to indulge into a well-earned lunch.

At least, that's what I tell myself as I pass the bus stop. After all, I still have twenty minutes until the bus comes and it's freezing out.

As I walk past one of the windows to the diner, I look inside for the first time - I didn't get a chance to this morning. Instead, I see Lance waiting a table with the same stupid apron around his hips. I huff and look down to avoid seeing him, heading for the door. When I reach for the handle, I feel my chest spasm in panic as I realize something.

The connection between me and my soulmate isn't open.

I shouldn't be able to see Lance right now without the connection, but I do.

Lance is really here and there are only a few feet and a door between us.

I look up again and sure enough, Lance is grinning at some customers while writing down their order.

He is really here.

I snatch my hand back as if the handle burned me and hesitate for a moment before racing down the sidewalk, skipping the bus entirely to get as far away from that diner as possible.

Because soulmates are stupid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Suggestions and criticism are more than welcome. Let me know if there's anything you want to see in this, there's wiggle room for a lot! I'll try to update regularly. My tumblr is @clover-monkey, I post a lot of Voltron fanart and I'd love to talk to you!


	2. Like Seeking a Demon for Advice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith turns to someone for help, but she is practically a demon. Enjoy Keith's embarrassment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: it gets a little dirty toward the ending, but nothing explicit. If you don't like that, this may not be for you because I plan to include smut later on

I stare, horrified at my reflection in my bathroom mirror. _Where is he? I shouldn't see myself, I should see him. Our connection is open, so why can't I see him?_ I frantically think.

I know I'm in denial. I know that when you experience the sense of your soulmate in reality and not through the connection it disappears permanently except for the emotions. But I was hoping it was my imagination fooling me.

I can still feel his comfort and concern trying to reach out to me, but I keep pushing it away.

How could he have been so close to me without either of us knowing? I have seen him work at the same damn diner for almost two years through reflections and it ends up being on the same block as the bus stop I have used for even longer? How many times have we almost ran into each other? Have we been on the same bus and I just never noticed?

The connection finally breaks - it burst open because of my sheer, sudden panic almost ten minutes ago. As I ran from the diner, I saw him in the reflection of a shop I ran past, physically taken aback by my panic and holding himself up on the counter behind him. The image had washed way slowly before my eyes even though our connection was still open, so I cursed and ran faster, keeping my head down until I made it to my apartment building despite the burn in my legs and my lungs.

Now, I'm conflicted.

I could still feel his emotions but I can't see him anymore. It's killing me. I always wished I hadn't been paired with a soulmate. I always hated seeing a stranger everywhere. I hated feeling his positive energy when I was at my lowest points. I hated having to be afraid to feel anything because I knew if I did it would open a connection in which a stranger could peek inside my life. I hated not having control of my own life.

But it feels so lonely. It's as if I can't remember what my life was like before our connection opened for the first time, before there was always someone there for me when nobody else was, even if they weren't  _really_ there.

I sigh, hunching over the sink. "What the hell is wrong with me?" I groan, rubbing the heels of my hands into my puffy eyes. Normally, I would welcome solitude but that's the last thing I want right now. I grab my phone and scroll through my contacts. Concluding I would only receive a lecture from Shiro rather than much needed comfort, I dial Pidge's number.

She picks up on the third ring. "Hey, Kool-Aid."

"Hey, Pig Den. You're losing your touch; you would never call me something with 'cool' included in the name," I respond, laughing shakily when I hear her snort. "You busy?"

"Only studying for my midterm on computer sciences in astrophysics, but not much I suppose," she says sarcastically.

I roll my eyes, "Midterms aren't for another few weeks. Do you want to hang out when you're done? We could go play video games for free at Best Buy for a few hours."

She's silent for a moment. "You drive a hard bargain," she starts, "I'm studying with someone right now, but I'll meet you at Best Buy in an hour and a half."

"Cool, I'll see you then, Pigtails," I smirk, relaxing slightly.

"Enough with the 'pig' ones-" she starts. I cut her off, hanging up the phone. I look back up in the mirror at my reflection and looking back is an exhausted and sickly-looking version of myself.

My stomach brings my attention to the fact I still haven't had lunch and it's nearly three in the afternoon now. I leave the bathroom and grab some leftover pizza from a week ago for lunch and decide to distract myself with schoolwork until I meet Pidge.

* * *

"I'm offended you started without me, Pudgey," I say, walking up to her.

Pidge doesn't look away from the sample game she's playing on some new console when she says, "Nice try, but you've used that one before, Kettle. Besides, you're the one who's late."

I grab a controller and join her game, "I lost track of time."

"So, why the spontaneous invite to hang out?" Pidge ignores my taunt, trying to seem casual even though I can tell she's worried.

"It's nothing. How was studying?" I ask to change the subject. Luckily, she gets the hint and reluctantly answers my question.

"It was pretty good, actually. You know how I usually get super frantic and stressed when studying? The guy I was with, Hunk, was really nice and laid-back. He actually made it pretty fun. Plus, he brought food," she says before jumping up excitedly when she manages to kill the boss in the video game. "For once, I feel like I'm prepared for this exam."

"Even though you always end up nailing it regardless, nerd," I snort, bumping her with my hip. She scoffs and steps on my foot. "Hey, hey, do you really want to start wrestling in here? We'll be banned and this is the only place we can play video games," I remind her, wincing at the sharp pain in my toes.

"Fine, but don't underestimate me. I'm a mighty ball of fury condensed into a tiny body," she glares, setting down the controller when the sample ends. I set mine down, too, as she asks, "Do you want to try that one?"

I look at the console where she's pointing but freeze when I see a tall, tan guy with short brown hair facing away right beside it. "Uh," I start, panicking.

The whole point of leaving my house today was to distract myself from thinking of Lance. Now, he's here?

"Hey, are you alright?" Pidge asks, grabbing my elbow in an attempt to catch my attention. As she does, the guy turns around and I realize he looks nothing like Lance. He's hardly even as tall as him. "Do you know that guy or something?"

I exhale a sigh of relief and shake her off of me. "No, I thought I did for a second. Yeah, let's go play it."

Pidge follows me despite the unsure expression on her face. "Did that guy have something to do with your random call to hang out? Because you're acting really weird. You could've asked to hang out this morning on the way to class, but instead you call me hours later than that with a shaky voice and acting unusually happy. So something big must have happened and left you all shaken up," she says, stopping beside me at the new console but crossing her arms instead of picking up a controller.

"Pidge, really, I'm fine. It was nothing," I wave dismissively at her.

"Clearly you aren't. Now, are you going to tell me what the hell happened or should I just stop wasting my time and leave?" she demands.

I look away, furrowing my eyebrows. After a moment of contemplation, I cross my arms and mumble, "Okay, I'll tell you. But it's private, so I'd prefer to do it alone."

"Let's go, then," Pidge nods, unwrapping her puffy coat from around her waist and putting it back on. After a moment of staring at her incredulously, I follow her suit and zip my leather jacket back up over my hoodie. "Matt is working at his new job all night so we can go back to my place. He just went shopping, too, so we can find something for dinner there."

With that, we walk in silence the whole way to her apartment while I nervously think of a way to explain everything to her.

I've been to her and Matt's apartment dozens of times since we met three years ago. Luckily, it's only two blocks away from Best Buy so we brave the cold to walk there rather than having to pay bus fare. I open the door for her to the building and she hurries in ahead of me to the elevator.

When we finally arrive to her apartment, we strip off our layers and she moves into the kitchen to scavenge for food. "I'll let you talk while I cook. No interruptions, I promise," she says, plucking a box of macaroni and cheese from a cupboard.

"Okay," I sigh. "But keep in mind the only person who knows about this is Shiro," I say before taking a seat on the island counter behind her. My first sentence causes her to visibly tense, but she keeps her promise of not interrupting. "I have a soulmate. We connected years ago and. . . Well, you know how I feel about soulmates. I get annoyed that I don't have a say in something involving my life, and this is pretty big. I'm able to see him through reflections when our connection is open and, based off what I've seen when our connection is open, his sense to me is taste. He's how I learned how to read lips and I constantly catch him gushing about having a soulmate to others when our connection is open.

"It makes me feel so guilty. He deserves someone who is just as enthusiastic about soulmates. Besides, he's way too good-looking for me," I laugh weakly, looking down at my hands. "But Shiro always tells me I should feel lucky and that I'm ungrateful.

"Anyway, today I may have seen him in person," I wince. Pidge turns around quickly in shock as she strains the noodles in the sink but is still silent. "Yeah, and I panicked and ran away before he saw me. Because my panic was so strong, the connection opened except I couldn't see him anymore. So he was really there, but I ran like a complete idiot! And now I have no idea what to do."

Pidge hands me a bowl of macaroni and cheese and leads me into the dining room. "Is that all?"

I sit down and rest my now pounding head on the table. I think for a second before saying, "Yeah, I think so. Go ahead."

"You're a dumbass," Pidge states simply, sitting across from me, "and I'm slightly hurt you didn't trust me enough to tell me, but I understand." I don't reply. I just sigh loudly with my forehead resting on the table. "Look, Keith, I completely understand that you hate the whole concept of something greater tampering with your life, okay? But what I'm seeing is you letting that hatred keep you from realizing there has to be a reason you were paired with him."

I lift my head up and stare at her. "What do you mean?"

She chews for a moment while thinking of what to say. Once she swallows, she asks, "Have you ever heard any stories of soulmates who didn't work out? Soulmates who broke up, divorced, or separated because they just didn't fit together?" I shake my head in the middle of chewing after thinking for a moment. "Exactly. Unless one or both of them dies, soulmates stay together. I can tell you're sick of Shiro telling you how you should feel lucky, but I'm not going to tell you that. What I am going to tell you is you're choosing to give up an amazing opportunity of guaranteed happiness just to be a rebellious little shit to the universe. So take that, think for a while on what you think the smartest thing for you to do is, and just do it already," she concludes, shrugging and taking another bite of her macaroni and cheese.

I blink at her. "Damn, Pidge, who knew you could be so insightful," I muse.

"Shut up," she rolls her eyes.

While we eat in silence, I think about Lance. I think about how happy he might be if he met his soulmate. I wonder how he would feel if he knew _I_ was his soulmate or about us being together. I remember the times I've seen him cuddling with children I assumed to be relatives and even his roommate and how I would push away the yearn to be in their place. I remember the times I would be absolutely furious and the only thing that could help me calm back down was his comfort reaching out to me through our connection. He would be happy, right? Or would he hate me?

"Do you think he would hate me for knowing who he is without trying to talk to him in real life?" I blurt out.

Pidge rolls her eyes again, "We just went through this. Of course not, soulmates don't hate each other. Even if he was mad, you two will get through it in the end. Just don't be stupid." I gnaw on my lip, ready to voice more of my concerns, until she casually asks, "So what's the weirdest thing that has happened to you and your soulmate? I don't know anybody who has one."

I'm taken aback by her sudden question but feel my face heat up immediately when I know the exact answer to her question. "That's none of your business," I mumble, shoving more food in my mouth and hiding my face in the bowl.

Pidge sits up straighter, face brightening with mischief, "Nuh-uh, this has to be good if it's making _you_ blush. You _have_ to tell me now. What happened?"

I hang my head back to face the ceiling, groaning into my hands that are covering my face, "Pidge, don't make me say it. Please. Have mercy."

"Nope. This is your payment for my counseling, my mac, and my time, now spill," she grins evilly.

I peek at her between my fingers before reluctantly dropping my hands. Knowing Pidge, she won't let this escape her. "Fine. It was sophomore year of high school when we first connected. It was really weird at first, naturally. One of the first few times our connection opened, Lance was. . ." I trail off and clear my throat, looking away. "Let's just say he was doing something that is common for horny high school boys to do."

Pidge bursts out laughing, hanging onto her chair to hold herself up. I scowl, my face growing warmer. "And you saw him jerking off?" she howls, "Oh my god! This is the funniest thing ever!"

"Yeah, yeah, laugh all you want, Satan, " I glare, flicking a cheesy noodle in her direction.

Eventually, her laughter dies down and she wipes her teary eyes. "Oh, man, that is freaking hilarious," she giggles. "So do you guys just have a silent pact now or something that you aren't allowed to do that anymore?"

"I fucking wish," I mutter.

"Wait, does he-" Pidge starts.

"Okay, I was done with this conversation five minutes ago," I interrupt, standing up. I walk away to put my empty bowl in the sink, hearing her laughter resuming behind me. "I need to head out now if I'm going to catch the bus," I say, checking the time on my phone, "I'll see you later, yeah?"

I turn to see her grinning ear-to-ear and tears prickling the corners of her eyes from laughing. She sobers herself up to say, "Sure. By the way, the guy I was studying with earlier, Hunk, invited me to a party tomorrow night with his friends. We should go."

"Sounds good," I nod, putting my jacket, gloves, and shoes on while she drops her own bowl in the sink. "Text me the info for the time and place. Oh, and Pidge?" I catch her attention, opening the door to leave. "Thanks."

* * *

It takes me over half an hour to get back to my apartment. I'm freezing and exhausted, but instead of passing out in bed I force myself into a hot shower with loud music in the background to keep me awake.

After I shower, I put my boxers on and brush my teeth. Once I've made sure I don't have any work due tomorrow, I finally head into my room, plug my phone in, and climb in bed under my comforter more than ready to sleep. However, thoughts from today crash into me full force, keeping me from sleeping. My loneliness pries open our connection and I feel his energy wash over me like a wave, almost refreshing.

He can sense it right away. As I lay in bed, I feel his comfort wrapping around my chest from behind like arms holding me. I relax in his not-so physical embrace, thankful for his solace, until an idea pops into my head.

A slightly dirty one.

I blush, remembering my conversation with Pidge and roll onto my back, nervousness pulsing in my chest.

"Screw it," I whisper, sliding my shaking hand underneath my boxers. A blush rises to my cheeks as I feel my soulmate's sudden surprise hit me and I grin smugly, the embarrassment turning almost into confidence. _How does it feel to be on the receiving end?_ I think, hoping the thought is conveyed to him. I decide it's also somewhat payback for the times he has done this to me at the most inconvenient moments for me.

His surprise quickly turns to panic and slight embarrassment. I smirk, imagining him hurrying to excuse himself from his friends to hide in his bedroom, undoubtedly feeling the same warmth I do below his waist.

However, I'm startled a moment later when the same warmth is being reciprocated.

"Oh my god," I whisper, freezing as my face burns when I realize he's mimicking me.

Needless to say, it took a while before I was able to get some sleep.

* * *

"Pidge, I swear to God, I regret telling you anything," I hiss, pulling her back.

"Come on, this was your idea! I'm just ensuring you don't go back on your word," she rolls her eyes, still pulling my arm towards the diner.

I scoff, "All I did was tell you where he worked!"

While looking for a place to eat lunch, I may have made the mistake of telling Pidge that Lance works at this diner. Then, of course, she put together a plan for us to eat here so I could meet him, hence my ignored begs for us to leave.

"Yeah, but you thought it was a good idea to come eat here!" she points out, finally turning to face me.

"Initially!" I cross my arms, "Please don't make me do this."

Despite my desperate pleas, she puts her hands on her hips sternly until I reluctantly lead her inside.

"Welcome to the Lion's Den Diner, how may I help you?" a girl - who oddly has a British accent - asks as soon as we walk in. I glare stare at the floor, trying to control my emotions so I don't accidentally open the connection with Lance in case he is here.

"A table for two, please," Pidge asks politely.

"Right this way," the worker instructs, leading us to a nearby table. Pidge and I sit across from each other as she informs us our waiter will help us soon.

Once she leaves, I risk looking up at Pidge to see smug smirk on her face. "So, what are you going to get?" she asks.

I glare at her briefly before practically burying my face in the menu. "I hate you," I grumble.

"Love you, too," she grins, looking at her own menu.

I take a deep breath and try to calm myself. _I mean, what are the odds he's even working right now? They're slim, but not as much as the odds of him being our waiter, right? He probably isn't even here today, a lot of college students take Fridays off work. Maybe he left town for vacation-_

My thoughts are cut off by a voice saying, "Hello, I'll be your waiter today. The name's Lance. Can I get you two something to drink?"

And then, I'm coughing because I choked on my own spit.


	3. Accidents Happen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance meets Keith twice in the same day. Keith messes up, but is it really an accident if it felt so good?  
> Also, Pidge turns out to be a really good counselor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for the kind comments so far! You really motivate me to keep writing. So here it is!

As I choke rather unflatteringly on my spit, Pidge nervously says, "Hi, uh, I guess I'll order while he. . ." I look up at her to see her wince. "Yeah, anyway, I'll have. . ."

I frantically compose myself and pick up my menu with shaking hands. "And for you?" he asks.

I finally look up at him. He stares down at me, amusement glowing on his face. "Uh, just a mint tea for me," I answer.

He smiles as he writes it down on his notepad, one hip jutted out to the side with the apron draped lazily over it. I lick my lips, trying my hardest to tame my emotions to not accidentally open our connection right beside each other. "Alright! I'll get these back out to you as soon as possible," he grins at each of us. Then, he sends me a wink - I had to mentally convince myself it was even real - and walks away.

I blush and nod, watching as goes. I find myself thankful his apron doesn't cover his backside.

"Wow, could you at least _try_ to be less obvious? I can smell your arousal from here," Pidge grimaces.

I glare at her, "Hey, you forced me into this. Don't forget that."

She flips through the menu, "Are you controlling your emotions?"

"Yeah, but it's difficult. Not sure we should stay for dessert."

"Maybe you shouldn't conceal your emotions and you guys can have the whole 'soulmate meeting' moment. Besides, it looks like you already got _your_ dessert as he walked away," Pidge snickers.

After kicking her shin from underneath the table, I say, "I'm not telling him here. There are too many people around." Pidge rolls her eyes in response but lets it go.

Soon, Lance comes back with two mugs - one with my tea and another with Pidge's hot chocolate. "Here you go," he chirps. "Good choice on the mint tea - it's one of my favorites. Could I get you two anything to eat?"

I blush, knowing the reason he likes mint tea is probably because of me. It's my favorite beverage and there was a time where I drank it everyday.

Pidge orders a plate of chocolate chip pancakes before Lance turns to me expectantly. "Could I just have a side of fries?" I mutter as we hand him our menus.

"Sure thing, hot stuff. Want me to upgrade that to an order of cheesy fries? I'll give you a discount," he offers, winking at me again as he writes on his notepad.

My face warms up. "Really? Yeah, thanks," I respond, smiling shyly at him.

When he leaves again, I prop my elbows up on the table with my panicked face between my cold hands. "Pidge," I whine quietly.

"I'm not sure if I should be cheering or vomiting," she deadpans. I groan and drop my head on the table. "Still keeping your emotions in hand?"

"yeah," I mutter, sitting back up. "But his flirting is making it hard. I've seen Lance flirt aimlessly countless times, but I never expected to be on the receiving end. It actually kind of sucks because to him I'm just another person, you know?"

Pidge groans, "Dear lord, dude, he just met you. It's not like he is just going to marry you on the spot."

I glare at her and we banter back and forth until Lance returns with our food. "Enjoy your food. Wave me over when you're ready for the check," he smiles, handing us our plates.

"Thanks, Lance," I mutter, smiling up at him. He tilts his head slightly in surprise before smiling, nodding, and retreating back to the counter.

We eat and talking in between bites of food either about Lance - whenever he isn't nearby - or about the party. According to Pidge, the party is at a more upscale apartment building basically on the opposite side of the convenience store where Shiro works from my apartment. She advises to arrive later when more people will be there and it will be less awkward.

Anything she said about Lance, however, I tried to ignore to keep myself from blushing too much. By the time we finished eating, her ankles were bruised from the amount of times I had to kick her for making suggestive looks anytime Lance passed our table.

Eventually, Pidge waves him back over for the check. He drops it off with his trademark smile before being whisked away to another table. I marvel at how fluid he moves for only a moment before tearing my eyes away to help Pidge with the check. In the end, Pidge and I leave the diner without speaking to Lance besides bidding him goodbye - to which he wished us a good night.

It's bittersweet as I make my way to my apartment alone. At first, I mentally gush about the whole encounter: seeing him in person, speaking to him, and, hell, him even flirting with me. Then, I begin to worry about where I go from here.

My mind races, frantically trying to come up with ideas. I could become a regular customer there and feign innocence when he finds out we're soulmates. I could march in there and be straightforward with him. I could move away, change my name, and start a new life.

Annoyed with the thoughts plaguing my mind, I take my earbuds out of my pocket and listen to some music on the rest of the way to drown them out. At times like this, I stand by my belief of soulmates being stupid. So, I try to take my mind off of the whole situation by looking forward to the party tonight and texting Shiro the invitation.

Maybe for just one night I can feel normal.

* * *

I yawn behind the thick, red scarf around my neck. I found it while getting ready for the party in a box of belongings I don't normally use, but I can already tell this winter is going to be worse than the last few so I decided to resurrect it. I'm glad I did, too, because Shiro is late and I'm stuck waiting outside in the cold. He was supposed to meet me almost twenty minutes ago to go to the party. Usually, Shiro and I just go to a bar or stay in at his place on a Friday night so when I told him about the party, he was excited.

"Keith," I hear from behind me. I turn to see Shiro jogging up to me. "Sorry about that. Since Kolivan is on vacation, I had to close up the store," he explains.

I roll my eyes and turn around, "Let's just go, I'm freezing my ass off and it's still a few blocks away."

I feel a little guilty that I still haven't caught Shiro up on everything that has been going on with Lance, but I'm not in the mood to talk about it - especially not with him. I'd rather not start an hour long scolding in the mood I'm in right now. Since lunch, my energy and mood have been tanking. At this point, I just want to get drunk and not think about it.

Clearly, Lance feels the same way. Our connection opens as we walk and I feel a thick bubbling in my torso. He's already drunk and I can't help but smirk at that - the night has just begun.

Finally, we find ourselves entering Balmera Apartments and using the elevator to get to the sixth floor as Pidge's directions instructed us to do. I knock on the door and we start unzipping our jackets. The music from inside shakes the door and I wonder if they will get a noise complaint.

The door opens and a tall girl appears. "Hi, welcome! I'm Shay," she grins, opening the door for us. We smile politely and enter. After she quickly shows us where to put our coats and shoes, she returns to the party.

We follow her a moment later into the living room which is connected to both a dining room and the kitchen, all filled by about two dozen people. Shiro heads straight away to the kitchen for a drink and I begin to follow.

Suddenly, Pidge is stumbling up to me, anxious about something. "Keith! You're here. I need to tell you something quickly-" she starts, looking around us nervously.

"You okay, Piddle?" I ask, furrowing my eyebrows.

"You won't be," she laughs weakly. Her voice drops as she adds, "He's here."

My face falls and, as if on cue, Lance comes stumbling in from the bathroom, looking exactly as drunk as he felt earlier when our connection was over. "Shit," I whisper, horrified.

I watch as he drapes a lazy arm over someone's shoulders - I recognize him to be Lance's roommate. "The guy he's with, that's Hunk. He's the guy I've been studying with but trust me, I had no idea he was friends with Lance," she confesses.

And now my head is spinning. I groan, running a hand down my face. "I need a goddamn drink," I mutter, heading to the kitchen after Shiro, carefully avoiding Lance who hasn't seemed to notice me from the dining room.

I grab a bottle of beer and lean against a wall along the edge of the living room beside the hallway, only sometimes looking up to observe everyone. Lance bounces from room to room, talking animatedly to anyone who will listen. Shiro converses with a girl I almost didn't recognize as the one who seated Pidge and I at the diner earlier and a tall, lanky man who is older with bright orange hair and a matching, thick mustache. Pidge is playing with a group of people on the living room floor an obscene card game I recognize. She often motions for me to join the game but I decline each time. For quite a while, I only move from that spot to kitchen for a new bottle of beer.

As I drink the last of my third bottle, I hear Lance exclaim excitedly about the song change. "I love this song," he gushes, turning the stereo up even more.

I choke on my drink when I see him dancing to the sensual yet upbeat song. He sways his hips back and forth so enticingly. I clear my throat and watch, feeling goosebumps rise up my back and down my arms.

My eyes zone in on his hips, entranced by the hypnotic movements. When my eyes finally make it back to his face, I'm startled to see he's staring right back at me with dark eyes that I'm positive reflect my own. I feel my cheeks grow warm as I notice he's slowly dancing towards me. After briefly surveying the room as I set the empty beer bottle down on a nearby table, I see nobody even realizes what is happening right now. Not even Shiro or Pidge. I press my back against the wall, trying to keep calm as I notice Lance is dancing _towards me_.

"You were at the diner earlier," he breathes once there's only a foot of space separating us, his voice low and husky and so tantalizing.

I feel our connection beginning to open but I inwardly fight to keep it shut. "Yeah," is all I can pathetically make out.

"I don't know what it is about you, but I couldn't stop thinking of you all afternoon," he confesses, inching closer,

My heart beats dangerously fast in my chest. "Neither could I," I confess.

He leans over me, so close now that our shirts are grazing each other and his nose nuzzles down into my cheekbone. "I want to kiss you but it's strange. I have a soulmate yet I've never been so attracted to someone else," he whispers.

I feel heart clench in my chest at his blind loyalty towards me. My temptations wins me over when I blurt out, "How do you know I'm not your soulmate?"

Lance smirks, dropping his head to look me in the eyes. "I guess there's one way for me to find out," he responds. I lick my lips and for a split second neither of us do anything.

That is, until I find myself pushing him into the dark hallway beside us and up against the wall, out of sight from everyone else. I tilt my head up slightly and kiss him softly at first, forcing myself to take my time despite the desire rapidly building up in my chest.

Lance slides his hand from my jaw to the back of my head, kissing back immediately. Our connection finally snaps open, electrifying my entire body with excitement. Lance clearly feels it, too, because he takes control and pushes me into the wall behind me and picks up speed. I moan into his mouth, pulling his body closer to mine by his hips, digging my fingers into his skin.

"You _are_ him, aren't you?" Lance slurs between kisses.

"Yes," I whisper huskily, looking at him nervously, but he goes back to kissing me.

He moves his hands around my neck underneath my scarf, causing it to float down behind my feet. I bite down softly on his bottom lip and nearly crumble in his arms at the sound he makes when I do. In response, he tugs on the hair behind my ear - an area that until now I hadn't realized was a sweet spot for me - which causes me to moan embarrassingly loud. Lance takes this opportunity with my lips parted to deepen our kiss, gliding his tongue against mine. I lick the roof of his mouth behind his teeth, causing him to shiver beneath my hands. I feel his fingers trail down my neck, chest, and stomach until I feel his cold touch against my skin beneath my shirt.

At this point, my head is spinning, our connection is so intense I feel it throbbing in my veins, and Lance is pushing up my shirt. I remind myself there are dozens of people in the room right beside us and that we're both drunk. Reluctantly, I shove his hands away.

"Lance," I try to say but it comes out as a moan, encouraging him as he moves to kiss my neck just below my jaw. "Lance," I say, clearer this time although still shaky. I push him away and his hazy eyes look at me, confused, as I continue, "We can't do this now. We're drunk, and. . ."

Lance pouts, reaching out for the bottom of my shirt again, "Are you sure?"

"I. . . I'm sorry," I shake my head, taking his hand off my shirt and holding it instead. "I don't want to mess this up." Lance's expression seems to sober up as he smiles at me.

But I could not have been more wrong as he passes out in my arms a second later.

"Really, Lance? You have to be fucking kidding me," I curse, laughing bitterly. Of course, my first kiss with my soulmate ends up with him passing out. I sigh, holding him up with my elbows hooked underneath his armpits. I try to shift him more comfortably so I can get him to the couch. Entering the living room, I'm surprised to see nobody too bothered by the fact I'm carrying around someone who's unconscious. I lay him down on the couch carefully - but not so gracefully - and run a hand down my face. I look to my right and see Pidge passed out, too, on the floor in a ball with ta throw pillow tucked between her knees and her chest. Straight ahead of me, Shiro is still talking to the girl but now in the kitchen with her sitting on top of the counter and him standing between her legs.

Not wanting to interrupt Shiro, I shoot him a quick text to inform him I'm walking Pidge home before moving to wake her up. She finally wakes up after the sixth attempt and stands up groggily, agreeing to let me walk her home.

By the time we're in our coats and shoes and leaving the building, she has waken up a little more but is still being slow. Meanwhile, I'm still shaken up by what has happened in the past half hour. "Pidge, could you walk a little faster or do you want me to just carry you? I'm freezing out here and I want to go home," I speak up, quieting as I add the last part.

"Alright, alright, let me hitch a ride," she says, yawning.

"Just don't drool on me if you fall asleep," I grin half-heartedly, squatting slightly so she can jump on my back.

Thanks to the several drinks in my system, I nearly fall over at first but luckily regain my composure. "You good?" she asks from above my head.

I hook my elbows under her knees, thankful that Pidge's apartment isn't too far from here.. "Yeah, just a little more drunk than I thought."

"I mean with Lance."

Sighing, I continue the long walk and reply, "I don't know."

"Talk to me, Kellogg," she murmurs into my hair, resting her head on top of mine.

"Well, he was dancing. . . and I was staring. . . and then we were suddenly making out in the hallway," I wince as I tell her.

Pidge tenses, then sits up, "Wait, what?"

"I couldn't stop myself! I think he told me not to kiss him at first because he has a soulmate so I asked, 'What if I'm your soulmate?'. Then, he encouraged me to find out and so we just kissed! We were both hammered - why did I choose _that_ as the time I come out to him as his soulmate?" I exclaim, regret pooling in my stomach as I fully recall the even out loud. "But then, he tried to pick things up. I told him we shouldn't while we were drunk and he literally passed out in my arms. God, what the hell, Pidge? What did I do? He's going to-"

"Don't even say he's going to hate you, we already went through this," Pidge scolds. "Yeah, what you did was incredibly stupid, but he's at fault, too, and at least you realize what you did was not the best thing in the world to do. All you can do for now is let this take its course, okay? Accidents happen."

"But, Pidge. . ."

"But nothing. If I were you, I'd contemplate what to say the next time you see him. And I know you tend to spiral in the midst of your emotions, so just focus on the good in all of this. I mean, you made out with your soulmate. That's amazing, " Pidge says, laughing at the end.

I laugh weakly, too. "Thanks, Porridge."

Her cheek rests against the top of my head again as she says, "And if you want, Hunk and I are having breakfast tomorrow at Olkari Cakes. After all, waffles are your hangover cure, are they not?"

"Your proposition is tempting. . ." I trail off, feigning contemplation. "Alright, I'll come."

"Awesome! It'll be at ten-ish. Maybe later if we're still asleep."

"Will, uh," I clear my throat, "Lance be there?"

"No. You should be safe for at least the next twelve hours," Pidge responds and I can practically hear her eyes rolling.

I walk the rest of the way to her building in silence. Along the way, I feel her tense every once in a while as if she's fading in and out of sleep. It wouldn't surprise me, though, with how quiet she is.

When I step inside her apartment building, the sting in my face from the cold turns into dull throbbing. In the elevator, Pidge stirs but only briefly. I knock on her apartment door softly, mentally hoping Matt is home so I don't have to wake Pidge up to unlock the door.

Thankfully, the door opens only a moment later. I put my finger to my lips and point at Pidge, a muted warning that she's asleep, and he nods in understanding.

"Thanks for bringing her back safely," Matt whispers, letting me inside..

I wave it off and find my way to her bedroom where I put her down on her bed.

Pidge wakes up slightly as she plops into her pile of pillows and blankets. "Eh? Matt?" she grumbles.

"No, it's me. See you tomorrow, gremlin," I whisper, flicking her forehead. She scrunches her nose at me with her eyes shut and buries her face in her pillow. I smirk and leave, only chatting with Matt briefly before seeing myself out.

Fortunately, because I'm drunk my thoughts don't bother me as much as they normally would for the rest of the night. However, when I am only a block away from my building, I feel the connection opening slowly.

I regret welcoming it with open arms because a moment later, I'm vomiting in a public trash can. I curse, spitting the bile out of my mouth. Lance's strong nausea from his own vomiting opened our connection and it along with my own pushed me over the edge.

I impulsively look at a car window ahead of me, searching for Lance's image to make sure he's okay, but I frown when I remember I can't anymore. I suppose it's a good thing, though, because he shouldn't be able to taste the puke in my mouth.

I close my eyes, reaching comfort out to him and he does the same. His, though, feels apologetic - I think he knows he made me throw up and feels guilty about it even though it would have happened sooner or later. I smile at his thoughtfulness as our connection ends.

I cough into the trash can, spit once more, then hurry into my apartment building. Before I go to pass out in bed, I make myself some mint tea for my stomach and to rid my mouth of the acidic taste. As I lay in bed sipping my tea in my coziest pajamas, I smile to myself in the dark at the memory of my moment with Lance. It leaves me so giddy that, once my tea is finished, I tug at the hair at the hair behind my ear just like Lance did to help myself fall asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone catch the Gorillaz reference? No? I'm a nerd? Okay, that's fine
> 
> (Although 10/10 recommend them, awesome band)
> 
> Also, warning for the next chapter: it sucks. Poor Keith :c


	4. A Cinderella Story (Idiot College Student Edition)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance was blackout drunk and can't remember Keith. Keith is silently suffering.

I lick my lips at the sight of my plated waffles being set in front of me. My stomach has been growling all morning but because Pidge decided to sleep in, Hunk and I were forced to wait until noon to meet her here. The three of us are exhausted and probably look like it, too.

"God, my head feels like an overused kickdrum," I groan, hurrying to cut up my waffles.

"Agreed," Hunk frowns before vowing he's never going to drink again.

Pidge scoffs, her mouth full of pancakes, "Please, Hunk. We're college students, we're bound for more disastrous drinking nights."

"Yeah, well, I'm making a sobriety pact, anyway," he grumbles.

I listen to them bicker while eating my own food. Every once in a while, I jump in and choose one of their sides on a matter just to rile the other up.

"No way, Keith! There is no Mothman! It's just a ruse, just like Bigfoot," Hunk exclaims, crossing his arms over his chest.

This subject, however, is one I am really vehement about. I scoff incredulously at the same time Pidge scolds him, "You take that back, Hunk."

"Yeah, Mothman and Bigfoot are very real, thank you very much," I add, crossing my own arms.

"Let me prove you wrong then," Hunk shrugs, taking his phone out. However, when he turns it on, his face falls. "Shit," he mumbles.

"What is it?" Pidge asks, playfulness leaving her voice immediately.

"It's Lance, he's-" Hunk starts before the door of the restaurant bursts open behind me.

"Hunk! What the hell, you left me hanging! I'm in a crisis here and you didn't answer any of my calls or texts!" I hear Lance from behind me, causing me to tense up. He slides in the booth beside Hunk directly across from me, his face exasperated.

Speak of the devil.

I choke on my food when I recognize the red scarf wrapped tightly around Lance's neck. Dear god, I left it at the party last night. I try to clear the food lodged in my throat discretely.

"I'm sorry! I just saw them, my phone was on silent," Hunk confesses.

Pidge and I share a panicked expression as Lance says, "Okay, I believe you, but I need your help here, buddy."

 _Why hasn't Lance said anything to me? What's happening? Am I hallucinating? Dreaming? Invisible? Does he forget last night? He hasn't even addressed that Pidge and I are here!_ Even with these questions swirling around my mind, I can't help but marvel at him. He's hungover, anyone could tell, but he still looks so pretty. His hair isn't as neat as it was at the diner yesterday and his face is slightly paler, but that's about it. It's unfair someone can still look this attractive when hungover.

Lance hesitates to continue when he notices us sitting across from him. "Oh, I know you guys. You were at the diner yesterday, right?"

My chest plummets. He really doesn't remember me.

Pidge rushes in to my aid, "Yeah, we were. I also met you at the party last night."

Lance's face brightens as if he remembers something and I'm hopeful for a moment when he says, "That's exactly why I'm here, actually."

"Is it, now?" Pidge encourages him, glancing at me reassuringly.

Lance nods, "Okay, so I'll start from the beginning for you two since you don't know. After all, any friends of Hunk's are friends of mine."

I melt into his smile that he beams at us despite the painful curiosity scratching at my skull. I can't even tell anymore if he really doesn't remember or if he's just toying with me.

"So get on with it, Lance," Hunk reminds him, turning his body to face him.

He nods again, leaning forward on our table. I lean back as he does, just to be safe. "Right, right," he starts. "So, I have a soulmate. Awesome, right? My connection to them is taste, but last night I woke up on the couch after passing out during the party. As soon as I moved, I vomited - which, sorry again about that, Hunk - and passed out almost right afterwards. But when I was vomiting-"

"Is this really necessary to the story?" Hunk whines, looking at his half-eaten omelette distastefully.

Lance puts his hand on his friend's shoulder, "I promise it is, buddy. When I was vomiting, I kind of forced my connection with my soulmate open. I accidentally made them throw up, too, but I couldn't taste it!"

We all blink at his overwrought expression. "And that's. . . bad. . .?" Pidge says slowly.

"Yes!" Lance throws his hands up in the air. "Since I passed out right after, I didn't think too much of it. But this morning, I remembered. I checked to make sure I wasn't dreaming or anything by reaching out to my soulmate. Once our connection was open, I couldn't taste anything! Nothing at all!"

I remember that. I was showering to get ready to meet Pidge and Hunk when I felt his confusion and panic this morning but I admittedly didn't think much of it.

"Maybe he just didn't eat yet," Hunk shrugs, mouth full of food.

Lance shakes his head. "No. Nope. They always taste like something. Usually it's mint or something similar, but even when they haven't eaten there's this really good taste in their mouth," Lance responds, licking his lips subconsciously as he scratches at the table's surface.

My face heats up and eyes widen. "Ew," Pidge murmurs beside me, pushing her plate away even though half of her pancakes still remain.

Lance blushes slightly, too, and seems to snap out of his thoughts. Hunk turns to him again with wide eyes, "Wait, you can't taste them anymore. And that can only mean. . ."

Lance nods frantically, looking at his friend, "Yes! It means I've tasted them in person!" My blush deepens at his choice of words and Pidge visibly recoils in disgust again. Lance hurries to rephrase himself, "In other words, I must have kissed them sometime during the party!"

"I don't see what the problem is," I finally speak up without thinking. Lance looks at me so I casually poke my waffles with my fork to avoid eye contact, swallowing the uneasiness in my throat. "I mean, you met your soulmate, right? That means he knows he's met you, too, and is probably looking for you. Happily ever after, the end," I shrug, taking another bite of my waffle while finally looking back up at him. I feel Pidge nudge my ankle roughly with her foot as if saying "what the hell are you doing?" but I ignore her.

Lance stares at me in thought for a short moment. Finally, he slouches over in defeat, mumbling, "But that isn't the whole problem; I feel awful. I don't remember them at all because I got too drunk and it's so embarrassing! The only thing I remember from last night is kissing them in the dark." His hand latches onto the red scarf and he rubs it between his thumb and forefinger, "Everything is still coming back in flashes."

"Just keep in mind, this means he's in the area and he could be easy to find. Like Keith said, he's probably looking for you right now," Pidge, smiles, "Who knows, he could be in this very diner." I nudge her the same way she did to me under the table but her grin only widens.

"But what if he doesn't want to find me now? I probably disgusted him! He'll never want to kiss me again," Lance groans, resting his forehead on the table. And I feel myself instinctively reach out to him through our connection. He has no idea that I could never be disgusted by him and kissing him is all I have been able to think about all day.

"I thought I had gotten through to him. I really did, Hunk. After years of being connected to him, I finally felt like he was opening up to me the past few weeks. Now, I've even managed to drive a _soulmate_ away," Lance sighs, leaning into Hunk's shoulder.

It's becoming painfully difficult to restrain my emotions so I stand up quickly, looking at my phone. "Sorry, guys, I have to go, Shiro just texted me and he needs my help. Pidge, could you pay for me? I'll pay you back later," I mutter, grabbing my coat and rushing outside without it even on.

As I'm leaving, I hear Pidge excuse me, "Keith gets uncomfortable whenever soulmates are mentioned."

I walk down the block towards Shiro's apartment and pull on my coat as I do, letting out a breath I've been holding. Finally, I allow the connection between me and Lance open. My chest instantly seizes at his apologetic and regretful emotions but I try my best to ignore it and dial Shiro's phone.

"Hello?" I hear after the fifth ring.

"Shiro, I need to come over."

Distantly, he says, "Now isn't the best time."

"It's important. Please," I mumble into the phone, waiting at a crosswalk.

He sighs, "Alright, how long 'til you'll be here?"

"Twenty minutes," I tell him before hanging up.

The connection begins to fade, so before it does I reach out to Lance to try to convey my forgiveness to him. I try to tell him that it's primarily my fault it ever happened - I'm the one that came to a party hosted by strangers, I'm the one who decided to stay, I'm the one that pushed him in the hallway and kissed him.

A hot tear slips out of the corner of my eye and I angrily wipe it away before it slides down my cheek. This is my fault. I really fucked up this time.

* * *

"What do you mean, you just _left_?" Shiro demands.

This is probably the tenth time he has interrupted me since I began to explain what has happened the past two days.

"I panicked and just left, okay? I didn't know what to do or say. It was not the time or place to tell him _I'm_ his soulmate, also the one that made out with him the night before that he _passed out on_ , okay?" I grind out. I run a hand down my face as Shiro sighs. My voice breaks as I add, "What am I supposed to do, Shiro? Up until a few weeks ago, I hated the fact that I had a soulmate. I dreaded the day I would meet him, if that ever happened. Meanwhile, Lance has been waiting his whole life for this. And now? I can't think straight even when I'm nowhere near him. All because I saw him in that stupid fucking diner." I huff, holding my head in my hands, the heels of them pushing into my temples.

"Well, it sounds to me like you're in love," Shiro smirks. I glare up at him, making him drop his teasing nature. "How am I supposed to know, Keith? I don't have a soulmate," he stresses, standing straighter from his position of leaning on the counter. "You need to tell him. Soon. The longer you drag this out, the worse it's going to get. If I were you, I'd do it tonight."

"Tonight?" I exclaim, dropping my hands. "I don't even know how to find him."

He walks away towards his room after checking the time, "You have mutual friends. It shouldn't be that hard. I have to get to work soon, but you'd better keep me updated on this from now on, got it?"

I roll my eyes but nod and grab my things. "Fine. I'll see you later, Shiro," I mutter without looking at him. I freeze when I notice a purse on the floor beside a pair of high heels. "Uh, Shiro?" I call back. His eyes follow my pointing finger and he blushes.

" _Goodbye,_ Keith," he grumbles, shoving me out the door.

I smirk. "Fine. Bye, Shiro. And goodbye Shiro's Lady Friend!" I call out behind him. He glares at me, face burning red, but falters when we hear a distant - and very British - "goodbye" come from his bedroom. The door slams in my face and I chuckle to myself.

I dial Pidge as I descend in the elevator. "Sorry, Pidge can't come to the phone right now, she's busy with real friends," I hear her answer in a flat voice.

I sigh, zipping up my jacket. I knew she'd be pissed at me. "I'm sorry, Pidge. It was unbearable in there - I just couldn't hold my emotions down."

"Well maybe then you should've, I don't know, _told Lance_ ," she suggests, a bite in her tone.

"I panicked," I insist. "Anyway, you'll be happy to hear I _am_ going to tell him."

"When?" she asks.

"Tonight," I reply shortly, stepping outside, "but I need your help. Do you have any idea where he is or where to find him?"

"Yeah, I'm with him right now actually."

I freeze in the middle of the sidewalk. "Wait, you're having this conversation in front of him?" I exclaim.

"No, you idiot, I took the call in the bathroom. I'm not stupid," she hisses. "We're hanging out in his apartment now. I can ask them if you can come over really quick before texting you the address but you probably drove them away with your rude episode earlier. Just head towards the diner where Lance works, it's a block away from that."

"Thanks, Pidge," I say. She hangs up on me before I finish speaking.

I huff and continue walking down the street, shoving my hands in my jacket pockets. I feel my pack of mint gum there and remember what Lance had said earlier during breakfast, a blush rising up my neck. I shrug, throwing a piece in my mouth, denying the fact that I chose to solely because Lance likes it.

I notice a bus stopping just ahead of me so I rush up to catch a ride. The bus, as usual, lacks heat so I curl up against the wall in my seat and contemplate what to say to Lance. Unfortunately, time slips away from me as the seemingly short ride ends and I find myself standing in front of Lance's cursed diner. Huffing, I cross my arms across my chest, bracing against the cold, and head down the street. Pidge had texted me the address while I was on the bus so it doesn't take long to find the apartment building.

In the elevator, my anxiety suddenly shoots up. I wipe my sweating palms on my jeans and clench my eyes shut. It takes a lot of willpower in me to step out of the elevator onto Lance's floor without forcing our connection open and from there I drag my feet to the door labeled "232" as Pidge texted me. After taking a deep breath, I knock three times.

Hunk opens the door and beams down at me. "Hey, Keith. Pidge told us you were headed over. Is everything okay with your friend?" he asks, stepping aside to let me in.

"Uh, yeah, everything's fine," I smile politely. He leaves me at the door, telling me to make myself at home. I shrug off my jacket and hoodie, kick off my shoes, and shut the apartment door. Every move I make is slow and steady, trying to calm my nerves while also procrastinating.

" _Ha_! Eat shit,  _loser_ ," I hear Pidge shout down the hallway. I follow the noise into the living room where Pidge is gloating at a betrayed Lance in front of the TV screen that displays Mario Kart (it also says first place was Yoshi, Pidge's go-to character). Hunk sits on the couch behind them, laughing at the scene. Pidge notices me enter. "Oh, you know what, Lance?" she smirks, "Keith is actually terrible at Mario Kart. I'm sure if there's anyone in the world who you can beat it would be him."

Despite Lance turning to face me excitedly, most of my nerves wash away and I scoff, crossing my arms, " _Excuse me_ , Pickle? Do you not remember how many-" I stop when I notice Pidge's gestures behind Lance, telling me to play along. "You know what? Fine. I'll play against Lance," I roll my eyes, trying to hide my smirk.

"Get ready to eat my dust, mullet," Lance grins.

I raise an eyebrow at him, taking Pidge's spot on the floor beside Lance and her controller, "Mullet?"

"Yeah, you know, that ugly 70s hairstyle that for some reason you have," he responds, setting up a new race.

"I don't have a mullet, I just haven't cut my hair in a while," I say defensively, resisting the urge to reach up and touch my hair self-consciously.

"Don't," he responds, making me turn to him in confusion. He blushes, "I mean, it suits you, you know? I have no idea how, but you pull it off," he rushes out. I smirk at his growing blush.

I turn my attention to the TV, choosing Shy Guy as my character while he chooses Toad.

"You wanna choose the track?" he asks, teasingly.

"Rainbow Road." 

Lance blinks at me, "Are you sure?"

"I'm always sure about Rainbow Road," I smirk.

He shrugs and chooses it, "If you say so." He won't admit it, but he looks a lot less confident in this match now.

Four races and several insults later, Lance yells, " _Best three out of five!_ "

I groan, falling back to lay on the floor. " _Lance_. It's been, like, a half an hour. Give it a rest."

"No! I  _have_ to beat you!" he insists, causing Pidge to snicker from the couch behind us.

Hunk speaks up tentatively, "Lance, maybe we should just take a break to eat at least."

"How  _dare_ you take his side! My own best friend!" he gasps dramatically.

"You don't need to prove anything to me, Lance," I laugh softly. My words take everyone aback and they all stare at me. I swallow a lump in my throat and look away to hide my blushing face. "Besides, it's getting way too easy to beat you."

Pidge laughs again and I hear Hunk sigh and stand up. "Well, I'm going to turn off the TV and order us some pizza. Sound good, Lance?" 

Lance is ready to argue until his stomach loudly growls. I snort. "Fine," he grumbles.

Lance takes the TV remote to find something to watch while we eat and Hunk leaves to order pizza on the phone so I pull myself on the couch beside Pidge. She nudges me, whispering, "When are you going to tell him?"

I suddenly get nervous again as I remember my promise. "Uh, well, soon," I try to assure her, but it sounds more like a question. 

"Keith," she hisses, "You have to. This has gone on long enough. Maybe now is a good time."

I inhale deeply and look down at the back of Lance's head. She's right, I know that, but I hate it when she's right.

Hunk returns, saving me from a response to Pidge. "Pizza should be here in twenty-five minutes."

"Awesome," I try to grin, knowing it probably looks more like a grimace.

Suddenly, we hear a knock at the apartment door.

"Expecting someone else or is the pizza guy that fast?" Pidge asks.

"No idea," Hunk responds, disappearing down the hallway, out of view. A few seconds later, he reappears excitedly. "Lance, you have a visitor. Your soulmate is here!"

And my heart plummets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How do you guys feel about me adding about 2 illustrations to each chapter? I'll continue to upload as often as possible so the art will be added a while after the chapter's upload, but I can also put them all on my tumblr to see.  
> Let me know what you think :)


	5. In Case of a Broken Heart, Apply a Cold Press.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith's heart breaks and he tries to cope with bad decisions. Lance's heart breaks and he tries to cope with bad decisions. Everyone wants to strangle them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Infinite apologies for the super late upload. I needed to take a break to focus on finals. Thank you for your patience xx  
> WARNING (AND SLIGHT SPOILER): There's unwanted kissing in this scene and drugs involved. If this is in any way triggering to you, please just skip the italicized section of this chapter. Please stay safe in your minds xx

**WARNING (AND SLIGHT SPOILER): There's unwanted kissing in this scene and drugs involved. If this is in any way triggering to you, please just skip the italicized section of this chapter. Please stay safe in your minds xx**

 

* * *

 

 

"My soulmate?!"

"Your soulmate?!"

Lance and I both exclaim at the same time at Hunk who nods enthusiastic. Pidge turns to me, absolutely confused just as I am. Meanwhile, Lance is jumping up and walking behind the couch to get a view down the hallway at his "soulmate".

"Hello, you must be Lance," A deep voice says from the hallway. A tall man walks in wearing dark jeans and a long black coat. "I believe you're the one who I. . . met at the party last night."

Lotor.

My body seizes up and suddenly I feel as if all of invulnerability is stripped out of my body and into his fist. I swallow and grip the cloth of the couch. Pidge notices, setting a comforting hand on my knee but keeping her taken aback eyes on him. It takes only a moment to compose myself.

"What are you doing here?" I stand up, briskly passing Lance and Hunk who, I'm sure, are taken aback by my outburst.

"Shit," Pidge whispers and I know why. She knows my past with him.

"Oh. Keith, I didn't see you there," Lotor smiles, acting as if nothing had ever happened.

"Why are you here?" I snap, repeating myself.

"Keith, what the hell are you doing?" I hear Lance from behind me. He moves between Lotor and I, getting in my face.

My eyes focus on Lance's angry ones. "Lance, he is not your soulmate, okay? I know him. He-"

"Stop, Keith! How would you know if he's my soulmate or not? Clearly you have history with him, but if you want to pick a fight with him then leave," he glares down at me.

I reel back in shock, trying to find any, any, hint that he isn't serious. I need to tell him. I need to tell him. He needs to know. I can't let him go through the same thing I went through. If only the connection between our souls would open he would know.

Instead of doing anything, I scoff pathetically and look at the floor, shoulders dropping in resignation. "Okay, Lance," I say, not bothering to hide the crack in my voice. "But don't tell me I didn't warn you when Lotor meets you with only empty promises and lies." 

I push past him and shove at Lotor especially hard, knocking him into the wall. "Keith," Pidge says from behind me again. I hear her follow me to the door.

"Oh, and you can keep the scarf," I throw over my shoulder, shrugging on my jacket. Pidge grabs her things, steps out in front of me, and I slam the door behind us.

In the elevator, I slide down the wall to the floor, pulling my weak knees to my chest. I release a quiet sob and Pidge sits beside me as we descend. Even now, my connection won't open. The one time I want - need - our connection to open and it won't.

"He's a dick," Pidge says once we step outside. I pick up my pace, trying to get as far away from his apartment building as possible. "Lotor, I mean. I remember what he did to you. Did he know you had a soulmate, too?" 

"Yes," I murmur, zipping up my jacket. "I told him everything about Lance, including his name.

He was the second person to find out about my soulmate. I bet one of his friends was at the party and told him I was there with someone named Lance. He would've recognized his name in relation to me."

Pidge brushes her hand against my arm for comfort, but unfortunately it doesn't erase my misery. We walk silently the rest of the way, opting to walk to our apartments rather than taking the bus.

In case of a broken heart, apply a cold press. 

At the moment, the cold weather will have to do.

"Stay the night," Pidge says when we make it to her apartment building. It doesn't take much convincing as being alone is the last thing I want, so I follow her inside.

"I thought you said Lance wouldn't hate me," I mumble in the elevator.

She grabs my arm, "He doesn't, Keith. He just doesn't know. You can't blame him for that seeing as though you never even told him! I mean, that would have been the perfect opportunity!"

Once she finishes unleashing every thought she's had on our walk, I huff and mutter, "I know."

Her shoulders relax in empathy at the sight of me. She knows I'm defeated and that I know I fucked up. We walk onto her floor and in her apartment in silence and, after borrowing some of Matt's pajamas, I pass out on the couch to the sound of Pidge watching TV to drown away my thoughts.

The next morning, I wake up and feel my heart break all over again once I remember the events of last night. I sit up on Pidge and Matt's couch, looking around. I groan, rubbing my eyes with the heels of my hands and standing up.

"Good morning, Keith," I hear Pidge say in the kitchen behind me.

"Morning," I mumble, turning around. "What's for breakfast?"

She smiles over her shoulder, body facing the stove, "I'm making pancakes. Can you wake up Matt? He got in late so he might be cranky."

I yawn and stand up, stretching my arms over my head. After getting Matt, we sit down at the table with Pidge and start eating.

"I love seeing you around and everything, man," Matt says, mouth full of pancake, "But don't you have your own apartment and stuff? There's nothing wrong with you being here, I just see you here a lot more recently and I'm worried-"

"Matt," Pidge warns, "He had a rough night. No big deal."

I smile at her gratefully, "Thanks, Matt, but I'll be fine."

To relieve the slight tension, he adds, "It would be nice, though, if for once you took her to stay at your apartment. I can hardly live with this little gremlin-"

He's cut off by a thump under the table which I discover to be Pidge's foot in his shin since he starts to double over the table in pain.

The rest of breakfast feels normal. Before everything was confusing, before I saw Lance in his diner the other day, back to what I know best. I can finally feel normal, I realize, while Pidge and Matt unknowingly chase away memories and thoughts about the past few days with their bantering and messing around. However, it's cut short when Matt has to get ready and leave for work.

Pidge turns to me while dumping dirty dishes in the sink and asks, "So what are you going to do now?"

I shrug, standing up, "Probably go home and get some homework done-"

"I mean with Lance."

I freeze and turn to her. I sigh when I see that serious look on her face, knowing she won't let me leave until she has a good answer. "What am I supposed to do, Pidge? Eventually he will realize Lotor isn't his soulmate, I know that much, but last I checked he didn't look like he ever wanted to see me again. He can do whatever the hell he wants with his life, frankly I don't give a fuck anymore," I rant, turning with a huff to go into the living room and grab my clothes.

"You know that's not true," she says gently.

"Yeah, well, it doesn't matter, does it? Even if I care, he clearly doesn't."

"You know that isn't true. You should have told him-"

"I know!" I snap, turning around to face her. "I should have done a lot of things! I had a million opportunities to tell him and I didn't. I shouldn't have left him alone to get himself heartbroken with my goddamn ex. I shouldn't have let my ex get away with what he did, in the past and just yesterday. I know Pidge, okay? I've been thinking about it ever since. But what the hell am I supposed to do now? If I tell him now he'll just hate me more." Somehow, throughout that, I went from yelling to almost dry sobbing.

"Keith," she whispers, unsure of what to do. "I know you're at a loss but you can't just do nothing."

"I'm not doing nothing," I say, composing myself, feeling my walls being built back up again.

"I'm going home and focusing on what really matters."

I grab my clothes and hurry to the bathroom. Suddenly, the urge to not be alone from last night has vanished completely. I need to get out. And after changing and putting Matt's clothes back in his room, I do with only a brief "goodbye" to Pidge.

On my way out of the building, I get a call from Shiro. I answer it in the elevator, slumping against the wall. "Hello?" I mumble.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he asks.

"Nothing, I'm tired, I just woke up," I lie. "What's up?"

"Your first shift is tomorrow at two until ten." I had completely forgot about the new job. I sigh away from the phone before thanking Shiro. "No problem."

I suddenly get an idea as I exit the elevator. "Hey, do you know if there's a party going on anywhere tonight?"

Silence on the other side of the phone until, "Are you fucking kidding?"

"What?"

"We just went to one on Friday and I literally just told you your first shift at your new job is tomorrow."

"Not until the afternoon," I reason out, stepping outside. "Come on, help me out just one more time?" I plead.

I hear him sigh. "Okay, fine, but don't get too drunk. Just because our boss will be gone next week doesn't mean I'm letting you come in hungover. There's a party going down but it's going to be huge. You're bound to start drinking. You'll have to try to control yourself-"

"Thanks, man," I interrupt. "Text me the address."

I hang up and walk to the bus stop. On the way to my apartment, I look out the window and wish, once again, that things were back to the way they were a week ago. The bus passes the diner that started it all and I curse at it under my breath. Suddenly, I'm more excited about tonight than anything. Despite Shiro's warnings, I plan to get drunk enough until I either can't remember anything about soulmates or die of alcohol poisoning, whichever comes first.

* * *

All day, I haven't had second thoughts about going to this party. But now, as I stand in front of the frat house where the party is going on right now, I do. I contemplate going back home, maybe going back to Pidge, even going to Lance. I don't, though, because when my thoughts end up back to Lance I'm reminded of why I'm here in the first place.

I bring myself to walk inside, immediately enveloped by the smell of booze and smoke, the warmth of sweating dancing bodies, and the sound of too-loud music pounding against my eardrums. I unzip my leather jacket and my way through the crowd, searching for a place to get alcohol. Eventually, I make it to the kitchen where I grab a bottle of beer. I crack it open and begin chugging, not paying attention to my surroundings.

In complete honesty, I realize I only came for the free alcohol.

When I get to my second drink, I relax a little more and head to the other room where everyone is dancing. Girls try to grind up against me as I dance and after a while of trying to get them to stop, I give up and head back into a kitchen for another drink and some space. I freeze in the doorway when, lo and behold, Lance is sitting on a barstool at the kitchen island with Lotor standing between his legs.

I blink repeatedly, willing myself to find out they really aren't are, that it's all just in my head.

But they're still there making out every time I open my eyes. My legs move on their own until I'm standing in the corner of the kitchen. I watch as Lance grips at Lotor's shirt desperately, basically clawing at his back like he needs him. My heart breaks as I realize he didn't kiss me like that on Friday.

I finally snap out of my haze and grab two more bottles of beer. I walk as fast as I can out of the house and into the quiet and empty street alone. In the silence, I hear myself sobbing and realize I've been crying. I wipe my face with my hands messily, attempting to wipe the tears away but instead smearing them around. As I start to head down the street, I open one of the beers I grabbed and start drinking.

"Fuck," I slur to myself. "What the fuck am I doing?"

I check my phone to see it is somehow already past midnight. How has over an hour passed since I got here?

By the time I get onto the next street, I've finished my beer. I drop it in someone's recycling bin on the side of the street along with the bottle cap of the other bottle. I stagger down the street, drinking my beer, when a car suddenly drives up beside me and slows down. The window rolls down to reveal Shiro and a girl in the driver seat who looks familiar somehow.

"I fucking knew it," Shiro shakes his head. "Allura, stop the car, please."

"Shiro," I grin lazily, watching as he gets out of the car. "What are you doing here?"

"Saving your ass," he mutters, gripping me roughly by the back of the collar of my jacket and shoving me to the car. "Get in."

I climb in the backseat and lay down. "Please let me know if you feel nauseous. This is a new car," the girl says in a slight British accent.

I hum in response, ready to take another swig of my beer when Shiro steals it. "Hey!" I yell, reaching for it.

He shuts the door in my face and goes back to the passenger seat. "Let's go," he says gently to Allura. He then turns to me, frowning. I can't help but flinch just at his countenance. "You're in deep shit. I'm beginning to wish I didn't get you a job at all. You're staying with me tonight."

"I'm sorry," I insist, slouching against the window. The lights outside pass by in a blur, making me slightly dizzy. "But it's all his fault," I mutter angrily.

"Whose fault?" he asks.

"Lance. Him and his dumb face."

"Wait, did you just say-" Allura starts, but doesn't finish.

I look up to see her and Shiro sharing a funny look. "Do you know him? Can you tell him he's a dick? Please? And tell Lotor, too. If you see Lance he's most likely sucking his face anyway so you might as well," I mumble.

"Keith, we can't understand anything you're saying," Shiro says.

"I said" I say, much louder, "Lance is a dick. Tell him and his new asshole boyfriend to go fuck themselves."

Allura laughs, "Keith, Lance doesn't have a boyfriend."

"Yeah he does! And he's gullible enough to believe Lotor is actually his soulmate," I scoff, leaning back into the window. It's cold. The cold feels so good. I feel like my body is on fire-

"Oh, Lotor? Hunk told me Lance knew he was lying to him about being his soulmate," Allura informs me.

I look back at her again. "So why was he making out with Lotor like crazy at the party?"

She and Shiro are silent for a moment, sharing a confused look. Then, suddenly, she slams the brakes on the car and turns to face me. "Keith," she says, serious tone leaking into my ears, "Are you sure it was them?"

"Of course. I would recognize my soulmate anywhere. Why do you think I left?" I frown. 

Her jaw drops but it takes only a moment to compose herself. She turns the car around and drives back towards the party. "What's wrong?" Shiro asks her.

"They got into a huge fight earlier. Lance was absolutely livid that Lotor would have the indecency to pretend to be something so meaningful to him. They almost got physical, Hunk had to force Lotor to leave. Does that sound like someone Lance would make out with only hours later?" she asks. "Something's not right."

Anxiety suddenly sprouts from my chest. Now that I think about it, our connection hasn't opened all day. It wouldn't be too unusual if it weren't for the fact I was hammered. Me being drunk should have opened the connection by now.

That alone sobers me up slightly. I realize she's right; something's wrong, and I just left Lance alone with him.

* * *

* * *

_"My_ soulmate _?!"_

_"Your_ soulmate _?!"_

_I spring up from my seat and hurry around the couch past Hunk, my stomach butterflies going mad. I realize as I stand there, looking down the hall, that this is the moment I've been waiting for ever since I first connected with my soulmate._

_Down the hall, I see a man wearing dark wash jeans and a long black coat that's buttoned up to his neck. He smiles at me and starts walking closer. "Hello, you must be Lance. I believe you're the one who I. . ._ met _at the party last night."_

_I blush at the memory and open my mouth to say something, but someone beats me to it. "What are you doing here?" Keith demands, standing up and walking almost in front of me and in between my soulmate and I. I look at him in surprise and Pidge mumbles something I can't hear under her breath, glancing around at all of us with concern written on her face._

_"Oh, Keith, I didn't see you there," the man smiles._

_Keith ignores him and snaps, "Why are you here?"_

_I glare at him, "Keith, what the hell are you doing?" I push past him and stand between him and my soulmate._

_His eyes zero in on me and turn more pleading than angry, "Lance, he's not you're soulmate, okay? I know him. He-"_

_"Stop, Keith!" I exclaim. Who the hell is he to get in the way of what's supposed to be the best moment in my life? "How would you know if he's my soulmate or not? Clearly you have history with him, but if you want to pick a fight with him then leave." I glare at him._

_He steps back, as if I had physically slapped him. It feels, even to me, that I have, but I keep my composure. No one is going to get in the way of this. He scoffs, looking down, and says, "Okay, Lance. But don't tell me I didn't warn you when Lotor meets you with only empty promises and lies."_

_He moves past me, shoves his shoulder into Lotor hard enough to pin his back against the wall, and slips on his shoes. "Keith," Pidge calls out, standing from the couch and following her friend past us._

_I watch as they throw their coats halfway on and open the door. Keith lets Pidge out ahead of him before saying, "Oh, and you can keep the scarf." Then, without even a glance in my direction, he shuts the door behind him._

_The scarf. How would he know about that?_

_Before I think about it further, Lotor speaks up, "Well, that was something."_

_"It sure was," Hunk speaks up from behind me._

_I look back at the door again. The apartment suddenly feels a lot lonelier. Just a few minutes ago we were having a blast together. But now. . ._

_"Anyway, where were we?" Lotor says. He takes my hand gently in his and kisses my knuckles, causing me to blush._

_"Oh, uh, thanks, but. . . Look, I. . . What was that all about? How do you know Keith?' I stammer._

_He sighs, looking down, but then smiles sheepishly. "We have history, unfortunately. It doesn't matter anymore."_

_I force a smile. "You're right. Why don't you come make yourself at home?"_

_The three of us move into the living room. Lotor and I sit on the opposite sides of the couch and Hunk takes the armchair. "So - Lotor, right? - How did you find us?"_

_"I went back to the apartment where the party was held and asked if they knew you. The girl who answered - I believe her name was Shay - told me where to find you but I asked her to not let it slip. I wanted to surprise you," he smiles, reaching for my hand and squeezing it._

_I laugh nervously. "That's nice of you. I'm sorry for having to ask, but is there any way you can prove you are really my soulmate?"_

_"I'm sorry?" he asks._

_"It's just. . . well, if I'm being honest I don't remember last night very well. I want to be sure," I explain._

_His smile tightens, "Alright, go ahead and ask me anything."_

_I think for a moment. "Okay, what is it you eat whenever our connection is open?"_

_He smiles, "Easy. Spicy food."_

_I nod, my shoulders relaxing. "Right. Now," I pause, thinking of something else to ask. I blush and say, "What is it we did the other night through our connection?"_

_Lotor's face doesn't change. No blush or anything. "Well that one is obvious," he laughs, and suddenly I'm worried he'll blurt it out shamelessly in front of Hunk, "Our connection opened and we comforted each other for the rest of the night."_

_My smile drops. "How?"_

_"Just through our emotions," he chuckles, as if it's obvious._

_It feels as if my body has been drained of everything I have. I was so close to having my soulmate. "You're wrong," I mutter, standing and moving away from him._

_"I'm sorry, what-"_

_"You're a liar," shout, pointing my finger in his face. "That's not what happened. What kind of sicko pretends to be someone's soulmate? Do you know how fucked up that is-"_

_"Lance," Hunk warns, pulling me behind him. He turns to Lotor. "You should leave. Now."_

_"This is ridiculous. Of course I'm you're soulmate, Lance-" he starts, standing up._

_"Liar!" I shout, looking over Hunk's shoulder. "Besides last night, the other night was the closest I have ever been to my soulmate! You're a liar, a sick liar. Get the hell out!"_

_"Lance-" he tries again, more forcefully._

_I try to move around Hunk but he holds his arm out to prevent me. "Get out! I yelled at my friend for you and you aren't even my fucking soulmate! You did this just to get under Keith's skin, didn't you? Dickhead!"_

_"Lance!" Hunk yells, pushing me back again lightly, a warning written on his face. I clench my jaw and step back, crossing my arms. He turns to Lotor. "Leave now, before we call the cops."_

_He sighs and straightens his jacket. "This isn't over, Lance," he smirks. I resist the urge to lunge over and punch him as he walks out._

_Still fuming, I turn around and go into the kitchen. "Lance, are you okay?" Hunk asks, following me. "Hey, what are you doing?"_

_"No, I'm not okay. I'm making myself some mint tea," I reply shortly. I notice Hunk check is phone anxiously in the corner of my eye and I sigh, putting a mug of tap water in the microwave. "I know you're supposed to be going to Shay's for the night soon. You don't have to worry about me, buddy."_

_"But I do. What just happened to you is terrible," he frowns, setting his hand on my shoulder._

_I smile weakly, "I know but it won't make me feel any better knowing you're skipping plans with your girlfriend to comfort me. I_ will  _feel better, though, if you do go."_

_"Lance. . ." Hunk whines._

_"Just go. See your girlfriend. Say 'hi' to her for me, okay?" I smile. The microwave beeps so I take out the hot mug and dip in the mint tea bag._

_He sighs, "Fine, but only if you call someone to hang out with you tonight. Call Allura, I'm sure she'll love to go out tonight."_

_I nod and smile. Satisfied, Hunk disappears into his room to pack clothes for his overnight. I sit on the couch and take out my phone, ready to text Allura. However, I see a notification from a group chat in one of my classes that catches my eye. I open the conversation to see they're discussing a party tonight. Thank god, I could use some alcohol._

_"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow," Hunk says, closing his bedroom door behind him. "Did you talk to Allura?"_

_"Not Allura, but I'm going to hang out with some people in one of my classes," I smile at him._

_"Ah, studying for finals?" he asks, grinning._

_My best friend is so pure. "Yeah, we're going to hit the library," I lie. "Have fun with Shay."_

_He waves and leaves. Once the door shuts, I stand up, dump my now empty mug in the sink, and hurry in my room to change._

* * *

 

_I finally make it to the party after almost an hour since it started thanks to me missing the first bus to get here. Emotionally drained, I make it through the dancing and grinding crowd to get to the alcohol. When I find the kitchen, I grab a plastic cup and pour myself some tequila and fruit juice._

_Suddenly, someone runs into me from the side, causing him to spill some of his drink on my side. "Ah, jeez, my bad," he slurs._

_I curse under my breath and reach across him for some napkins. "Uh, it's fine I guess," I say, looking at my probably stained shirt. He waddles away back out of the kitchen and I turn back to the drink. I take it and start chugging gulp after gulp. Once finished, I toss the cup in a trash can and head out to dance._

_I don't even make it out the doorway. I feel everything inside and outside of me glow brighter, taking me aback and causing me to fall into the doorway. "What the hell. . ." I mutter, clutching my head._

_Then, I see yellow everywhere. No, not yellow - gold. Everything is gold and shining and ethereal. It's all overwhelming. I want to drink it all in but it's too much. A stranger brushes past me and their brief touch electrifies me. I reach out to them for more but they pull away in confusion._

_"Can you hold me?" I try to say, but I choke on the words. The music gets louder from the other side of my head and I look out at the sea of people. All of them touching, electrified, connected. I stumble out, yearning for a connection to something. A connection to something real that I can hold onto._

_Someone comes up to me but I only see their smile. It shines at me like everything else. I feel arms wrapping around my body and I embrace it, holding it closer as I'm pulled into the warm group of dancing smiles. I need more. I need to feel more._

_I'm enveloped in happiness and love. Nothing is wrong. Nothing can be wrong. Everything is so much more than I ever thought - so much more beautiful._

_The smile moves away and I try to reach after it but it's replaced by another. It hypnotizes me as I'm pulled backwards. Then I'm sitting. I reach forward, desperate for touch and electricity and beauty. I grab something and it's enough. I clutch at it, pulling closer, when I feel it on my lips. It feels like Athena is kissing me. I pull closer, giving in, blinded by my ecstasy._

_Ecstasy._

_My golden world suddenly comes crashing down. Furrowing my eyebrows, I pull away from the touch despite my body's pleas to stay. I squint against the falsified light and see a familiar face._

_"L. . . Lotor. . .?" I mumble, leaning away._

_"Shh. . ." a soothing voice whispers, combing fingers through my hair. I moan at the feeling, unable to help myself. "Everything's okay. Don't you feel amazing?"_

_"You. . . drugged me?" I ask, trying to push him away._

_"Everything's okay," he repeats._

_I can't resist melting into his words. He pulls me back into his touch and I moan at it. Everything is enhanced. It all feels unreal. Everything feels sexual, happy, ecstatic._

_I've been drugged._

_The panic in my mind doesn't reach my body. Lotor continues to kiss me and ignore my protests whenever I can speak._ _Time passes but I can't tell how much._

_But then, all at once, he's gone. I look in front of me and see two bodies dancing around each other like a silent film. It's Lotor and Keith._

_Only a moment later, Keith is right in front of my face. Keith is saying something but the words don't register in my mind. My eyes glaze over and zero in on his face. He looks so beautiful. I lean forward, smashing my lips into his, and wrapping my arms and legs around his body, pulling his body against mine. He's so much more vibrant than the rest_ _._

_He pulls his face away but lifts me up, holding my body closer. I feel us moving, but I don't pay attention. I bury my face in his neck and kiss him there, trying to get closer but unable to._ _We go outside and I shiver against Keith. He's like a furnace in comparison to the cold air outside. It feels like soft needles against my skin, raising goosebumps all over my body._

_"I'm so sorry," I hear from above my head. "It'll be okay. I promise. It'll be okay."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kind comments so far, they motivate me!  
> I'll try to get back on a schedule with this. I hope you enjoyed this longer and multiple POV chapter to make up for my absence xx


	6. Dull World Without Soulmates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything hurts, no one is happy, and death is wished upon. AKA, Keith's backstory with Lotor and the day after the party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahahahah so just ignore the fact I haven't updated in a month+, yeah? I'm super sorry about it, I've had a lot of personal issues I had to deal with and I'm still dealing with most of them. I managed to find time to write this at 4am hahaha, it's short but I hope you enjoy anyway

When we got back to the party, I was the first one out of the car running inside. I went straight to where I saw them last and they were still there, kissing. In a flash, I pulled Lotor away and hit him repeatedly just trying to land a punch anywhere on him. It took Shiro to pull me off of him after I bruised his eye and split his lip. My only thoughts were my concern for Lance after that. Shiro tried to grab Lance but I could tell he wasn't in any condition to move.

"Lance, are you okay?" I had asked him, gripping his shoulders. His glazed eyes moved lazily, examining my face. Then, he took me by surprise and kissed me, nearly making me fall on top of him as he pulled me closer. I wouldn't have minded, but he wasn't in a right state of mind. So, I pulled away, picked him off the bar stool, and carried him to the car where Allura was impatiently waiting.

"How is he?" she asked through her opened window of her car. Shiro insisted she stay in the car so we could get out of here faster in case anything happened.

"He's okay, I think," Shiro replied from behind me.

I ignored them, bowing my head beside Lance's ear, "I'm so sorry. It'll be okay. I promise. It'll be okay."

I planted a kiss on top of Lance's head while Shiro opened the backseat door for me. I set Lance in the seat who whined when I pulled myself out of his clutch. "Get in," Shiro said, tiredly. "I have to be at work in five hours and I haven't slept. You owe me."

I went around the car and got in beside Lance who slumped against the seat with eyes blown wide open. "Lance, are you okay?" I muttered, just quiet enough so Allura and Shiro wouldn't hear.

He turned his head to face me, as if he didn't know I was sitting beside him. "Keith," he sighed, laying down with his head on my lap and staring up at me. For the entire drive, I held him while ignoring Shiro who was catching Allura up on the whole soulmate situation.

It took a while before Lance was able to form coherent sentences and by then we had made it to Allura's flat, the closest residence from the party. As he became more sober, though, he also became more hysterical, asking where the light was going and why he couldn't feel it. I brought up how we should take him to a hospital, but Allura and Shiro reminded me that the closest hospital is over thirty miles away and that Lance wouldn't be able to afford the hefty bill.

Now, I'm sitting on Allura's couch with Lance leaning against me while he weakly grasps at my clothes and body, trying to pull me closer. "Please, I can't. . . it's so dull. . ." he whines.

I hold him closer, wrapping my hands around his stomach while he leans his back against my chest. "It's okay, Lance, I'm right here," I whisper. It pains me so much to see him like this, so helpless. I turn to look behind the couch at Allura and Shiro who are on a laptop trying to figure out what is happening to Lance. "Have you found anything yet?"

"Not yet, but we're trying," Allura explains.

Then it clicks.

"Quintessence," I blurt out, heart dropping. I'm so stupid. "It's Quintessence."

Why the hell did it have to worm its way back into my life?

"What?" Shiro asks.

I turn to face him, "It's a drug for people who have soul bonds. Like ecstasy but stronger and it cuts off their connection with their soulmate for extended periods of time." I breathe in shakily and push his hair out of his face, "The come down is rough so he'll need some help."

"Keith, I'm sorry. . . I didn't listen. . ." Lance whines, reaching a hand up to touch my cheek.

I ignore Shiro and Allura's murmurs from behind us. "It's not your fault," I shake my head, taking his hand in mine.  _It's mine_ , my thoughts add. I shouldn't have left him in his apartment earlier. I could have prevented this and I didn't.

My train of thoughts is cut off when Allura steps beside the couch with a glass in her hand. "Here, drink this, Lance. It's juice, it should help you," she smiles.

Lance's shaky hands reach up and take the plastic cup. I help him sit up with his back against the couch so he doesn't accidentally spill it on himself and me in the half-laying position we were in. He leans back into the couch, his feeble body seemingly being sucked into the cushions. Soon enough, though, he has chugged down the entire glass and Allura is heading back into the kitchen to just retrieve the whole container.

 _I have done this before, too,_ I want to say. I would give anything to take this from him. Even after my recovery I would throw it all away to make him better.

When Allura comes back, she sits beside Lance to help me comfort him. Shiro, however, speaks up from the kitchen, saying, "Keith, don't forget you're not sober either. I'm going to take you to my place to clean you up, okay? Allura can take care of Lance."

I turn to face him, furrowing my eyebrows, "Are you kidding? I can't just leave him when  _I'm_ the reason why this happened in the first place!"

"This isn't up for debate," he says firmly. "Lance needs space right now from this situation."

Before I can respond, a soft thumb is placed between my eyebrows. I look over at Lance who's staring at me wide-eyed and concerned. "You're frowning," he whispers, rubbing his thumb in circles to relieve the tension there. My face softens and I realize Shiro's right.

The word "soulmate" is unsaid, but it's thick and scalding, like a tangled pile of freshly burnt rope that once held up something hopeful in the air.

"Goodbye, Lance," I whisper, standing up. I feel his hands chase after me and I don't need to see to know he is clawing at the air trying to catch me.

"Keith, no, I need you," he pleads.

 _It's the ecstasy talking_ , I convince myself, trying to ignore the little butterfly of hope that flutters inside my chest. "Let's go," I mutter to Shiro.

* * *

It's almost three in the morning by the time the busses get us to Shiro's apartment building. I had insisted on us going to my apartment instead since it was closer but Shiro refused stubbornly. 

"It's my fault," I blurt out in the elevator. It's the first time either of us have spoken since we boarded the last bus.

Shiro sighs, "Maybe. But it's more of Lotor's fault than your own." I say nothing as we get out onto his floor. I'm still pretty drunk so I slump against the doorframe of his apartment as he shuffles through his pocket for his key. "I wish you'd talk to me, Keith. I had no idea Lotor was even back in town, much less back trying to hurt you. Even when you two were together you told me nothing until you broke it off. Do you not trust me?"

"I trust you more than anyone," I insist as he unlocks the door and walks in ahead of me, "It's just. . . I don't want to burden you and you don't always say what's right-"

"You mean, I don't always say what you want to hear?" he throws over his shoulder, heading for the bathroom. Sighing, I kick the door shut behind me and sit on the couch. Shiro reappears a moment later with a paper cup of water and a pill. "Take this," he says, sitting on the couch. I take the pill and throw it to the back of my throat, downing the water right after. "Even now I still don't know the whole story with Lotor. Keith, he's dangerous. He  _drugged_ Lance. Do you not realize the gravity of the situation?"

"Of course I do," I push, my voice cracking. I look down at my hands, red on the knuckles from earlier. I slouch back against the couch in resignation, knowing Shiro won't leave me until I tell him everything. "Fine. I met Lotor at one of my first college parties, as you already know. But what you probably don't know is I hooked up with him that night. The morning after, I was so. . . embarrassed and ashamed of myself for getting with a stranger. But he surprised me by taking me to breakfast. It became a regular thing, I guess. Parties, sex, then breakfast the next day.

"He got bad after a month or so. He pressured me into drugs and, after I told him I had a soulmate, he forced me to have Quintessence." I notice Shiro tense up at that in the corner of my eye, but he surprisingly let's me continue. "He didn't like the idea of us having sex and someone else feeling it so I was on Quintessence almost everyday. I was so lost. . . I told him over and over again to stop forcing it on me but he told me that if I loved him I would take it. But the comedowns became worse each time. I was like his pet," I spit, glaring at my knuckles again. "It was like this for months and it's why I never saw or spoke to you again, Shiro. I knew you would be so disappointed. I just couldn't bear it. So I shut everyone out."

I inhale a shaky breath, relaxing a bit when I feel Shiro place a comforting hand on my shoulder. "And then he left town?"

"Yeah," I nod. "He told me one day he had to go back to England because his mother was sick and that he wouldn't come back for a while. I was so. . . angry. He had ruined me for over a year and now he was just leaving me. I told him to not bother coming back because I was going to right myself. And, as a harsher blow, I told him I would find my soulmate while he was gone and be with him. He  _hated_ whenever I spoke about my soulmate. So we fought for about three hours before I eventually just walked out. I didn't see him after that until earlier at Lance's house but he's still been a pain in my ass since from nightmares to my Quintessence addiction he caused."

"Keith," Shiro sighs. "I'm sorry you went through that alone." I say nothing. He stands, squeezing my shoulder lightly, "Get some sleep, Keith, we have work in a few hours. You can shower in the morning."

I watch as he leaves, thankful I didn't get an earful of "you should have done this" or "why did you do that?". I kick off my shoes and lay down, using my arms as a pillow under my head. I only get an hour of sleep.

* * *

"You look like shit."

"What gave it away? The bags under my eyes, the smell of vomit on me, or the visible weight on my shoulders from the fact that I managed to even fuck up my relationship with my soulmate?" I ask, propping my head up on my hands from the prior position of laying across the counter. "How did you find me?"

 "Hunk told me what happened. Didn't take me long to remember your new job," Pidge informs, mirroring my stance on the other side of the counter. "You're in some deep shit, huh?"

I whimper pathetically, tempted to drop my head back into the counter. "Yeah. How much do you know?"

"Everything, I think. You both ended up at the same party but Lance was drugged by Lotor so you got him out of there. Am I missing anything?" she asks, smiling sadly at me.

After a moment, I reply, "No, that's basically it. Oh, and the fact Lance was drugged with ecstasy that prevents soulmate connections from opening while under the influence. But you've basically got the idea."

"How much longer do you work?" Pidge asks.

My eyes drag to the clock past her. Somehow I've made it through most of my shift already. I yawn, gazing down at the wood of the counter and scratching at it absently. "Only twenty minutes."

"I'm buying you dinner, you clearly need it. And when's the last time you got the proper amount of sleep?" she folds her arms across her chest.

"Says you," I say, trying to deflect her comment and looking up to see if it works. She notices, however, and raises an eyebrow. I slump further down, returning my eyes to the cheap surface of the counter, "I don't remember." A minute of silence passes. "Have you-" I stop and clear my throat, "Did Hunk tell you how Lance was?"

Anxiety courses through my limbs, waking me up slightly as I wait for her response. All day, all I've been able to think about is how furious he is with me. I dragged him into this mess. If I had just told him hours before the party-

"He's better. Slept off most of the after-effects. He doesn't remember everything," she sighs.

I laugh bitterly, "A recurring theme, I see."

Pidge frowns at that before snapping up off the counter when the bell above the entrance rings, indicating a new customer. However, he just asks where the bathroom is so I point to the back corner. Once he leaves, she turns back to me and catches me off guard when she says, "He remembers you, Keith. He wants to talk to you, probably to understand what is going on."

I whine, finally allowing my head to drop back to the counter. "I don't think I  _can_ face him, Pidge. I fucking hate myself for all of this-"

"Shut the hell up," Pidge snaps, causing me to look up at her in shock. She furrows her eyebrows at me, "Can you blame him? He has no idea what's happening. You're keeping him in the dark, Keith, and the longer he goes without an explanation the more he gets hurt," her voice softens, "Please, you need to tell him. He's collateral damage and suffering."

"You think I don't know that?" I snap back, immediately slumping my shoulders after the malicious tone seeps out of my teeth. "Sorry. It's just-I didn't sleep all night last night. I've been thinking about this for the past twenty hours, Pidge. It's my fault. I'm  _hurting_ him. I'm hurting my soulmate! I can't-I-It hurts," I sob suddenly. No tears escape my eyes, though, as I've run out of tears to give.

Her hand grasps my shoulder for comfort. I quickly compose myself, nodding a 'goodbye' to the customer who is now leaving without a single purchase. I can't bring myself to care, though. As he walks out, another man comes in with an identical shirt as mine that brands the store's logo on the front. Another glace at the clock informs me that my shift is over, so he must be the worker for the night shift.

"I'll clock out," I mutter, standing slowly, feeling my bones creak below my weight. I inhale deeply, stretching my back, and grab my backpack and jacket. On my way around the counter, I knock on the door to the manager's office.

"Yeah?" I hear Shiro call from inside.

I drop my back to pull on my jacket. "I'm clocking out. The other guy is here."

I wait for a response, but instead the door swings open. "Keith, I don't think you should really be alone right now. . ." Shiro says quietly, concern furrowing his eyebrows.

"Don't worry, I have an escort," I roll my eyes, throwing my thumb over my shoulder to gesture at Pidge behind me.

"Oh!" he says, tension falling from his shoulders. "Okay, well. . . Just be careful, yeah?"

I huff, "I'll be fine. Bye, Shiro."

He shuts the door again as I turn to follow Pidge outside. The wind hits me full force, my cheeks immediately stinging upon it's sharp contact. "So, what's the plan?"

"Pizza?" Pidge asks, headed down the street towards her building. I agree and we walk in silence to a popular pizza restaurant on campus. Truth be told, it's only popular because it's cheap yet still doesn't taste that much like cardboard.

"What should I do, Pidge?" I ask, shoving my cold hands into my jean pockets.

She ponders a moment before answering. "If  _I_ were you, I'd wait until tomorrow. Then, I would go to Lance and tell him everything. From there, everything should work out, otherwise you wouldn't be soulmates. Am I right?"

I scoff and mutter, "You seem to always be right."

"And this is a shock to you?"

"Guess not."

* * *

I wake up in the middle of the night, chest heaving. Despite the nice night with Pidge devouring two pizzas and watching old movies - even falling asleep earlier than normal - I am jolted awake from a nightmare.

A nightmare involving Lance.

A nightmare that sprung open our connection for the first time in what feels like years.

I pant, overwhelmed by all of the emotions I'm feeling. Fear, guilt, and pain from the nightmare, but a bright relief through it caused by Lance. His warmth envelops my body and I instantly welcome it, wishing it to never leave again. Besides that, I feel tiredness, both physical and emotional, and increasing concern. I stand, wobbling on my freshly-awakening legs, and hurry to the bathroom, not even worried about waking Pidge who is still sleeping soundly feet away. I stumble through the door and flick up the light switch, looking in the mirror.

 _Oh_.

I forgot.

The hope dies in my chest as quickly as it came. My back hits the wall behind me as I stare defeatedly into my reflection. His comfort reaches out to me more but I ignore it. I slide down the wall and hug my knees to my chest, burying my face into them. The basketball shorts I borrowed from Matt soak in the leaking moisture from my eyes.

Longing.

Our connection rumbles from carrying the mutual feeling stronger than I have ever felt it. My chest aches; I've never wanted or needed someone so bad.

 _I'm sorry_ , I try to convey to him.  _I hurt you. I didn't protect you. You deserve so much more._

I feel confusion in response, but it's so brief before it turns into another apology - this time, from him.

I want to laugh at that, and I probably would have if it weren't for the aching in my chest from the connection.  _Lance, what the_ hell _do you have to apologize for? You've done nothing wrong_.

For the first time in our entire lives, our connection stays open for much longer than a few minutes. Almost an entire half hour goes by with us simply comforting each other through the connection, wordlessly communicating. At some point, I even returned to Pidge's bed, crawling in on my side underneath the warm covers.

Our vibrant connection slowly dims as we both gradually let sleep take over again, each of us drinking the others' fatigue to top off their own.

I don't have another nightmare the rest of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll try to upload again soon, but, like I said, I have a lot of stuff going on rn. Hope you liked it <3 and the angst is pretty much over I think hahah, we're getting in the last stretch, guys.
> 
> Check me out on Tumblr (clover-monkey) and Instagram (c.lovermonkey). I post klance fanart and would love to talk!
> 
> Comments keep the fire alive! Criticism welcome (as always) <3


	7. A Long-Awaited Confrontation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow!! I'm a Shitty Person!!!  
> Infinite apologies for the NINE MONTH HIATUs. I promise I didn't even realize how long it's been. Time has been escaping me and I haven't had much of it for myself. I hope this chapter makes up for it. AND I HAVE NOT GIVEN UP ON THIS STORY! Even after the GOD-AWFUL seasons 7 and 8, I will continue to write about my favorite characters.  
> I've had a lot of fun writing this, I'm super proud that this is my first work I've written. I think there will only be one more chapter after this, unfortunately.
> 
> RECAP: Lance was drugged by Lotor at a party and Keith, Shiro, and Allura helped him afterwards. But Keith avoided everyone afterwards because he blames himself and thinks Lance hates him. Pidge comforts him and Keith decides that he's gonna tell Lance the truth FOR REAL this time. The soulmate connection finally opened again after the repercussions of Lotor's drug at the end of the last episode after Keith had a nightmare and he basically realizes how much he needs Lance.

"Ready?" Pidge asks, nudging me with her shoulder cautiously.

I swallow a lump in my throat, looking up at Lance's apartment building. "You're sure he's here?"

"I texted Hunk before we left to make sure. Lance isn't expecting you, though," she responds.

After a deep breath, I step inside. "Let's go."

My nerves worsen the long way up to Hunk and Lance's apartment and Pidge can tell, so she knocks on the door when we arrive knowing I might back down. Hunk opens the door, "Hey, guys, come in!"

I blink at his cheery attitude - it's the first I've seen from  _anyone_ in a while - but follow Pidge inside. "Um, where's Lance?" I ask nervously.

"Keith!" a familiar voice exclaims from down the hallway. I turn to see a smiling Lance who runs to. . . hug me? Lance sighs, tightening his arms around my shoulders, "I want to thank you."

"T-Thank me?" I ask, incredulous, "Why?!"

He pulls away but keeps his hands on my shoulders, looking at me with a sincere expression, "First of all, you  _tried_ to warn me - I was just too stubborn to listen to you. And even after I threw your warning back in your face, you still saved me from that party." A soft blush appears on his cheeks, "So, thank you."

My heart swells at the sight of him but then falls at the realization that it won't last after I explain everything to him. "Lance, I need to talk to you in private. It's important."

He pulls away, dropping his hands to his sides, confused. He looks at Pidge and Hunk then returns his gaze to me and says, "Okay, sure, let's go to my room."

I take another deep breath and follow him past the living room into the last door. Lance closes the door once I enter behind him. "Can we. . . sit down?" I ask, awkwardly. Lance gestures for me to go ahead so we sit on the edge of his bed. "I know you probably won't understand why I'm telling you all of this but it will make sense at the end, okay?" Lance nods. "I'll start from the beginning. Lotor and I were a couple a few years ago. Our relationship was all sex, really, but I started to build up genuine feelings for him. I decided I wanted to get serious with him and to do that, I needed to tell him everything. So, when I told him I had a soulmate. . ." I trail off and look away once I see Lance's eyebrows raise in surprise, "he became abusive. He would force me to tell him every little detail I knew about my soulmate and he'd use those things against me. That stuff he drugged you with, Quintessence? He would force me to be on it whenever we were together so it would force the connection to stay shut.. This happened for years until he moved out of the country. Before he left, I broke things off. Luckily, I wasn't really addicted to Quintessence so I got clean pretty quickly."

"Keith. . ." Lance says softly, leaning closer to comfort me.

"I'm not. . . I'm not done," I grit out, preparing for the worst of it. I turn to face him, looking directly in his eyes. "Lance, I want you to answer this question. Your soulmate, did they disappear for over a year? Did your connection with them stay closed in that time? And when your connection reopened after all of that. . ." I pause my rambling, remembering that first day I had been completely clean from Quintessence and how relieved Lance had felt when our connection finally opened again. "Were you not filled with incredible relief? Relief so strong it was still there in your connection after  _months_?"

Lance freezes, apart from leaning away in uncertainty. "What are you saying?"

I open and close my mouth wordlessly, scrambling to think of anything to say. Lance only waits. Finally, I say, "I've always been afraid that I have a soulmate. Before I first connected, I thought my life was in my control only and that nothing could intervene. But that was proved wrong when I first saw the reflection of a stranger where my own reflection should have been. A stranger who has caramel skin and sapphire eyes. And then I was even more terrified, because not only did I not have control in my life anymore, but I knew I would inevitably let down this gorgeous stranger who is too good for this world and will always deserve better.

"My only comfort was knowing I would likely never meet you - every time I looked in reflections while our connection was open, the setting was unrecognizable to me - but then I walked past your goddamn diner and saw you for the first time. I  _really_ saw you, in the flesh. And I ran, because I was more scared than ever before. But then I kissed you at the party and, for once, I was  _hopeful_. But you didn't remember, and before I could tell you Lotor walked through your goddamn door, and-"

"Keith!" Lance chokes. I stop babbling and finally look up at him. HIs shoulders are tense and hunched, his chest is heaving, and tears are flowing endlessly from his eyes. "You're my soulmate?" he whispers.

I take a deep breath. "Yes. I'm your soulmate."

All at once, Lance breaks down. His hands fly to hair and pulls, and he emits a heart-wrenching sob. "You knew all this  _fucking time_?" he demands, standing up. He paces around in a circle, looking everywhere but me. My heart falls through the floor and my blood runs cold, but before I can rush to explain myself, he continues, "I  _confided_ to you about my soulmate! I-I was a fool! And all of the opportunities you had to tell me!"

"I'm sorry!" I blurt out, feeling tears run down my own face. "If I had known I would have caused this much trouble - if I had known Lotor would have gotten involved - I would have told you sooner-!"

"You think I blame you for Lotor?" he asks incredulously, finally facing me with enraged eyes. "That's not at all why I'm upset! And I don't even blame you for that! I'm pissed because I've known you for long enough that I even began to  _very obviously_ have feelings for you, yet you _still_   _never told me_!"

The realization hits me, now, that there is no excuse for what I did. I clench my jaw and look down. "I'm really sorry, Lance. I understand if you won't accept my apology. Like I said earlier, I've always known you deserve better than me. You deserve a better soulmate who will give you the first meeting you've always dreamed of. And I wish I was that person, but I'm not. I wish I deserved you, but I don't."

Lance doesn't respond for a moment, but his chest is still heaving. "Keith," he says finally, his voice forcefully even. I swallow a lump in my throat and look up at him. "You're a jackass," he sighs, shoulders relaxing as he sits beside me again, resigned. "But I accept your apology. I just. . . needed to get that out of my system."

"Are you okay?" I ask, cautiously meeting his eye.

"I'm fine. It's just a lot to process. And I kind of understand why you didn't tell me. We all have our insecurities, you know?" he laughs sadly. I offer him a small smile in response. "Also, for the record," he continues, looking down and gently taking my hand in his, "I'm really glad you're my soulmate."

"You are?" I raise my eyebrows in shock.

He breathes out a laugh, "Yes, idiot. Like I said, I've had a pretty obvious crush on you for a bit. If I would want anyone to be my soulmate, it's you."

And then a strange thing happens. It feels like a heartbreak, but instead of my heart shattering to the ground, lost and forgotten, it regrows fuller and more vibrant. This feeling pries open our connection, whirlwinds of emotions flooding our bodies. Lance laughs, blubbering through some leftover tears he hurries to wipe away, and I laugh, too. He surges forward, hugging me tightly and making me fall onto my back. I laugh again and bury my face into his neck, wrapping my arms around his middle.

"You're my soulmate," he breathes. I sense his excited disbelief in his curled toes.

"I'm your soulmate," I repeat, relaxing slightly.

After a while, Lance props himself up on his elbows and looks down at me. "You're pretty," he sighs, sniffling despite the grin on his face.

I look at the dried tears on his cheeks, his pink nose, and the red surrounding the vibrant blues in his eyes. "And you're gorgeous," I respond immediately, "But I've known that for a long time now."

I feel the ghost of a flutter in my heart, and I know based on the blush on Lance's cheeks it was from him. He sits up slightly, "So I was right, you could _see_ me through our connection."

"Mhm," I hum, smiling up at him. "And you had the taste sense, right?"

Lance nods, playing with a strand of my hair. "Pretty useless when trying to learn more about your soulmate apart from knowing you have good tastes in food."

"Besides jalapenos, right?" I smirk.

"Yes, besides those," he scowls, flicking my nose playfully. I bat his hand away but he persists, trying to flick me again, so I grab his hand and kiss it gently to catch him off guard. His blush flares up immediately, but he recovers by saying, "If flicking you is what it'll take for you to kiss me, then you'd better prepare yourself for a lot more."

I snort, "You don't need to flick me for a kiss, Lance." I slide my hands up to the back of his neck and he lets me pull his face closer to mine. Softly, I press my lips against his, erupting a feeling I could only describe as blissful finality. Lance presses deeper, tilting his head slightly to do so, and grips my shirt tightly in his fists.

We both jump when a knock on Lance's door startles us. "Keith? Lance? Are you both alive in there?" Hunk asks.

"Yeah, buddy, we're great!" Lance rushes to say, both of us blushing deeply in embarrassment. He carefully climbs off of me, smiling sheepishly. "In fact, I have some news for you," he says, headed to the door.

I sit up, feeling the ghost of a bubbly excitement in my chest from Lance as our connection closes again. "Actually, I heard already," Hunk laughs when Lance opens the door. "It was hard not to when you were yelling that loud. I'm sure our neighbors know that you two are soulmates, now."

Lance laughs sheepishly and I stand, touching Lance's back lightly, "Sorry about that. I think we got it all sorted out."

"Good. For a minute, I was worried Lance murdered you," he laughs, walking out to the living room. Lance takes my hand in his and, with a smile over his shoulder, pulls me along with him.

Pidge sits up upon our entrance and beams, "Finally! Lance, I have to admit, I've known for a while, but I didn't want to be the one to tell you. You have no idea how  _infuriating_ it was being on the sidelines."

"I imagine so," Lance responds, teasingly raising an eyebrow at me.

I cross my arms. "I apologized!" I insist sheepishly.

"I know," Lance smiles, bringing my hand up for him to kiss my knuckles.

My face heats up at the action, but Pidge's obnoxious gagging noise catches my attention so I flick her off with my free hand. "Eat shit, Midget."

"After you," she smirks. I only roll my eyes in response.

"So," Hunk starts, clapping his hands together, "Mario Kart, anyone?"

 

* * *

 

Five pizzas, too many hours of Mario Kart, and a movie and a half later, Lance and I are the only ones awake. Hunk is snoring loudly on the couch, Pidge is passed out on the chair, and the two of us are on the floor leaning back against the couch, only partially paying attention to the movie in front of us while we talk.

"I'm still so embarrassed about the party last week," Lance groans quietly, covering his face.

I laugh, tightening my arms around his middle. "Looking back now, it's pretty hilarious."

"No, it's not! I passed out in your arms after our first kiss!" he whines.

"You're lucky I caught you. You came down pretty fast," I tease, laughing harder when he groans again. "But I have to admit, that was the best make-out session I've ever had. It's a shame you don't remember."

Lance leans forward off my chest to turn and face me. "We could always recreate it," he smirks, wiggling his eyebrows.

I lick my lips. "It's tempting, but I'm not doing this when our friends are sleeping in the same room as us."

"We could always go to my room," he points out, his eyes narrowing on my lips.

I roll my eyes but grin. "Some other time. I'm too comfortable here."

Lance huffs but turns back around. After a moment of silence, he says, "Keith? Can I talk to you about something?"

"Okay, is everything alright?" I ask, suddenly worried.

"Yeah, it is now, but I want to talk about the year that you disappeared, if you're okay with that," he responds, looking at me from over his shoulder. Even more confused than before, I nod for him to go ahead. "So, that year I went through a lot. And I'm not at all trying to make you feel bad or anything, because I know you were going through your own shit at the time, but I just want you to know that I had a pretty hellish year. I was going through family issues and there was school stress, but the biggest factor was you. As cliché as it may sound, you were kind of like an anchor to me before you left. And after a month passed with you gone. . . well, I started to think you were dead." I grab his hand, guilt sinking heavily in my chest, but I let him continue. "Hunk was there for me by then and, thankfully for me, he helped me through it all. But I was close to giving up several times. And the day you came back. . ." he trails off, laughing sadly and looking down at our hands, "It felt like a miracle."

"I was stupid. No excuse will be good enough for what I put you through, but I'm really sorry," I whisper, running my thumb along the back of his hand.

He looks up at me and smiles. "I know, I know. Like I said, I'm not saying this to make you feel bad. I'm saying it because I want you to know how much having a soulmate means to me. I want you to know how much  _you_ mean to me."

Smiling, I say, "You're going to kill me one of these days, Lance. You mean so much to me, too. There have been so many times where I had a nightmare and you were there to comfort me through the connection. You've always been here for me."

Lance leans close and kisses me once, softly. When he pulls back after a while, he shakily whispers, "Is it too soon to say 'I love you'?" 

"Who's to say? Either way, we've been connected for years now. I've seen you more than some other people in my life, to be completely honest," I smile. "So, I know for a fact that I love you, Lance."

Lance's face lights up as he says, "I love you, too, Keith." I kiss him again, deeper than before, and take my hand from his to cup his jaw. Lance, however, breaks the kiss. "Speaking of seeing me everyday, did you like what you saw?" he smirks playfully.

My mind flies back to the few times our connection would open while he wasn't fully clothed, or in the shower, or the even fewer intimate times we had. "You have no idea," I smirk back, voice low. His eyes widen and his cheeks turn pink at that. Before Lance starts to ask more questions or ramble, I kiss him once more gently.

"We're not done with this conversation," he huffs, turning back towards the TV, "To be continued when our two best friends  _aren't_ in the same room."

"Can't wait," I smile, kissing the back of his neck.

Almost an hour later when the movie ends, Lance sits up straight and stretches his arms over his head. "That was a pretty shit movie," he yawns.

"Yeah, no kidding," I say, slowly standing up. I look down at Pidge's curled up body on the chair and sigh, "I should really get Pidge home."

Lance nods, standing up beside me. I raise an eyebrow when he starts to nervously scratch the back of his head. "Before you leave, would you maybe want to. . . I don't know, it's stupid how nervous I am from just asking this, but would you want to go on a date tomorrow night?" he rambles.

Amused, I laugh. "Lance, of course I want to go on a date with you tomorrow night.  _But_ I unfortunately have to work. How's the night after sound?" I ask, stepping closer and resting my hands on his hips.

His body relaxes and he smiles, clasping his hands behind my neck. "Sounds perfect," he whispers, kissing me gently.

I break off the kiss before it gets too heated and step back, turning to wake Pidge up. "Wake up, Piglet," I whisper, shaking her shoulder.

"What?" she groans, kicking me away.

"We should probably go home now," I tell her. "I'll give you a piggyback ride if you get up now." That seems to do the trick, as she lets out one more groan before groggily sitting up.

Lance follows us to the door and, as we slip on our shoes and coats, he exclaims, "Oh, I almost forgot! Wait here for just a second," and runs back to his room. He returns quickly with my scarf in hand. "I figured I should probably give this back," he says sheepishly.

I take it and smile. "It suits you more," I tell him, wrapping the scarf around his neck, "Keep it." And with that and one more kiss to his blushing cheek, I follow Pidge out the door.

"I was promised a piggyback ride," Pidge smirks. I roll my eyes and turn, allowing her to jump on my back. As I start towards the elevator, she asks, "Since when have you been a hopeless romantic?"

"Shut up, Pidge," I grumble, thankful she can't see my blush.

"I'm really happy for you, Keith. For a moment there, I was worried he wasn't going to forgive you," she admits.

I snort, "You and me both."

 

* * *

 

The next morning, I woke up near noon and practically had to go straight to work, however the whole time I was thinking about Lance. It hit me last night when I was walking home from Pidge's that I don't have any of Lance's contact information so I have no idea when or where our date is tomorrow.

Admittedly, I also wanted someone to text other than Pidge during the slow hours of work like now.

I yawn and flip through probably the third magazine in the past hour. I haven't even been reading through it, only looking like I am to customers that walk in every now and then. I lean forward, propping my head on my hand, and continue turning the pages. What compelled me to work until closing, the world may never know.

Eventually, I see someone step up to the counter in my peripheral vision. "Is this all for you today-" I start automatically, sitting back up. I freeze, though, when I see Lance standing there. "Lance? What are you doing here?" I ask, sitting even straighter.

"Hello to you, too," he smirks. "I'm saving you from boredom, it seems. I don't think I've ever seen anyone this bored since I last went to the post office."

I smile as he leans his forearms on the counter. "It's good to see you, Lance. But how did you know I work here?"

"I was bored so Hunk gave me Pidge's number and I asked where you worked so I could talk to you," he says as if it's obvious.

"You could have just asked her for my number, you know," I tease, matching his stance so our faces are closer together.

Lance smiles, eyes flicking between mine, "Yeah, but I missed you."

"It's only been a few hours," I point out despite my blush.

"My point exactly," he smirks, leaning forward to kiss my cheek. He reaches back to get his phone from his back pocket. "Besides, I can just get your number from you."

Once he unlocks his phone and opens his contact list, I add myself and hand his phone back to him. "I missed you, too," I admit with a small smile on my face.

A wide grin spreads on Lance's face at that. "Is it against employee policy to kiss customers?" he asks, leaning closer.

"Technically you aren't a customer since you haven't bought anything," I smirk before kissing him lightly.

"I have to run to class now, but I'll text you," he says softly, eyes raking over my face with a content smile.

"Okay, have a good day. And let me know the details for tomorrow," I say, kissing him once more.

Lance straightens, "Will do. I'll talk to you later,  _soulmate_."

I blush and roll my eyes, trying to contain a smile, "Goodbye, Lance."

As he pushes open the door, though, our connection opens and pure, unbridled joy and adoration filters through. I inhale deeply, absorbing it all. Lance glances back, beaming at me, and with one last wave he practically skips outside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is the big date with hot steamy smuttt ;;;)))))


End file.
